Chapter 43: Gameplan

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Any spelling or grammar mistakes please point them out! I used to be a gifted student and thrived at writing, but now I literally just can't read, so thanks bb 💕

Tom's POV

Guilt is a really annoying feeling. Especially when you normally never feel it. It just makes your stomach twist and you just feel so horrible. It makes you want to just crawl into a hole and hope things go back to the way they were.

Seeing Star sob and cry her eyes out. And not like cute cries like in the movies, but like super ugly cries. Like really hideous. Not that I'm calling her hideous, I mean she still looks beautiful. I'm just trying to make a point on how hard she's crying.

Now I'm not one to apologize to many people being as I never see myself in the wrong. But this time, I knew I was wrong. I guess the whole time I knew I was wrong, but I kept trying to tell myself that I'm the good guy here.

I walked over to her and sat next to her.

I took a deep breath.

Tom you know you messed up, like big time this time. Just admit that you were stupid, I thought to myself.

"Im sorry Star," I croaked.

She stopped sobbing. She looked up at me, her eyes super red from crying.

"What?" She said.

"I'm sorry," I said again, "I really messed up this time. I dragged all of you into this all because I wanted some petty revenge. I could sit here all day and try to convince you I did it out of the kindness of my heart, but I can't because I'm the bad guy here,"

She stared at me.

"It's just," I sighed, "I'm not good with emotions, you know that. I mean I really suck at communication and properly showing how I feel. And I'm just so mad all the time, at myself, at the world. I just feel like no matter how hard I try to change I'm still going to be that same guy I was before. I just sometimes wonder if there's even a point, but when I'm with you I feel happy. I don't feel so upset and angry, I just feel like everything is okay. I mean you just make my entire day seem brighter. And moments where I just feel happy and fine and okay with myself feel really good, and I guess when you left, I felt empty and mad again. Star, you're my entire inspiration for trying to get better and you make life worth living, but if I'm only going to hurt you, and if I can't learn how to be the person you want, then I'll go. I'll leave you alone. I wont bother you or Marco ever again,"

It was silent. For a while. I hated it. I opened up and I now I feel vulnerable.

"That's not what I want," Star said.

"What?" I turned to her.

"Tom, it's not like I want you gone forever," Star said, "I mean, when you aren't being a total psycho you are really fun to be around. I mean, back before I came to Earth, I was constantly told who to be and what to be. But you didn't care, you liked me for me and that meant a lot, it's just, I can't be with someone who doesn't realize the effects his actions have on other people,"

"I really want to change Star, I really do,"

Star gave a small smile.

Marco cleared his throat.

"Listen, I really hate to interrupt but we need to find a way out of here," He said.

"Your right," I jumped up and held out a hand to help Star up.

She stared at it hesitantly for a second, but then grabbed it and lifted herself up.

"I'll get us out of here," I said.

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