Fated to be his

32. Chocolate bars

That morning, when I walked out of Aiden's apartment; I told myself not to look back, I bit into my lip and whipped my eyes and walked down to Tiffany's car with blurred vision.

But as soon as I got in the car, I broke. Tears fell and gut wrenching sobs filled the car, I didn't hold back or try to stop them. It just hurt. Tiffany probably Albee what happened just by getting my text, so she didn't hesitate to drove away from his place and get me to her house.

Once we were there, she parked the car and took me into a hug; cooing to me that things were going to be ok, even though it didn't feel like it. I didn't want to hear those words, probably because they were the truth.

It was hard to think that both of our life's were going to continue on, just not with each other. That we would be going down different roads and I wouldn't have my Fated person with me in that.

At the same time, I also knew that this was a good thing. There are things that need to be worked through before Aiden and I can be together.

It just sucks.

I wish things were simple.

But who am I kidding, nothing is ever simple.

~~~Today~~~

"You want to continue watching?" Tiffany asks, holding the remote up, Netflix obliviously judging us for sitting on the couch all day, buried under chocolate wrappers, pizza boxes and a few dirty dishes.

"Yeah." I mumble, feeling my chest throb. 

Tiffany gives me a small smile and we continue to watch Reign.

I am interested in the episode, but soon I find my mind wondering to random places and before I get time to stop myself, the words are blurred out.

"How's Dennis?"

Tiffany clearly tenses and her eyes stay on the screen, even though she isn't really watching it what's happening anymore. "I think he is doing a little better."

"What have his parents said?"

"He still refuses to see me, the time I help him at school is really the only time I get to see him."

"I'm sorry Tiff."

She looks at me and then down at her hands, playing with her promise ring she got from him just a little while ago, before the accident.

"You don't need to apologize, I honestly believe he is just being immature and trying to push me away because he knows that things will be a little different between us now. I think he is scared I'll be with him and then decide to leave because he isn't the same."

"You would never do that." I watch as Tiffany nods in agreement, her eyes far off in memories as she plays with the ring.

"Riley...." she trails off and then looks up at me.

"Yeah?"

"Boys are dumb, do they not understand that we would do anything for them if they just let us?"

I laugh a little, "I don't think they do."

She sighs, "It's so frustrating."

"Amen to that." We both laugh and I lean forward grabbing two more chocolate bars from the coffee table, handing one to Tiffany.

We both one it and I hold mine out and we "clink" them together, both of us having teary eyes as we munch away on the chocolate as we turn our attention back to the screen.

~~~~ a few hours later~~~~

I open my eyes and look up at the screen to see that Netflix is asking us if we are still watching, rubbing my eyes, I sit up a little and see that Tiffany is passed out like I was.

Slowly sliding out of the blackest and off the couch, I go to the bathroom.

While washing my hands, I look at myself in the mirror and boy do I look like a heart broken girl. My eyes are red and puffy, my cheeks have dried tear lines, my hair is up in a messy bun and hasn't been taken out of it for a few days. Coping my hands, I lean down to splash my face with the cool water and dry it with a clean towel.

Going to the kitchen, I get a glass of water and drink it slowly, letting it run down my throat and fill it go throughout my body.

Back on the couch, I sit there and realize I haven't checked my phone in two days; speaking of phone. Where did I leave it?

Feeling my stomach drop, I begin to search everywhere and the frantic feeling inside starts to grow. I begin throughout pillows and blankets out of my way, making Tiffany wake up a little.

"What are you doing?" She grumbles and turns on her side, I let out a relieved sigh and quickly snatch my phone from the crack in the couch.

"Nothing, go back to sleep." I say softly and she does.

Walking to the stairs, I plop down on the first step and open my phone. My mom sent me a few pictures of her and Dad with the kids they are teaching, my dad sent me a text about how he had asked the neighbor to help my the lawn on Monday. Then my finger hovers over the next contact in my phone that sent me a message. Hesitating a little, I open it and read.

"Hey Riley, I'm sorry for what I did. I never should have done that, obliviously I wasn't in the right head space. Thinking about that night, I can only imagine how scared I made you and all the things Aiden said. He is right." I feel my chest tighten at just the mention of that night, that lead to that morning.

"You are not some object I can claim, you were never just that to me; but in my messed up state it's how I saw you. Fate is weird and I wish we got a better chance, but you and I both have our freewill to still pick who we want to be with. Don't feel like you have to be with me out of pity. Be with who you feel is right for you, who you can love with everything you have. Again, I'm so sorry."

I put down my phone and I sit there in silence.
He makes it sound so simple, but it's not; in time though I know things will work out how they are meant to. I just have to wait for that today.