Dangerous Love//Shawn Mendes

Chapter 4

I dragged a tube of bright red lipstick across my lips, carefully tracing the edges in smooth lines. Finished, I stood back and looked at my face, the dramatic stage makeup outlining all my features. I sprayed some hairspray in my hair for what felt like the 50th time and then I gathered my things and headed for the door. My mom was already waiting in the car for me, early as usual.

As we drove to the theatre, I couldn't help the uneasiness that was building in my chest. I never got nervous before shows, but I knew that that wasn't the reason I was nervous. Still, I refused to even think about Shawn. Whatever had happened between us was obviously a mistake to him, so why dwell on it?

As we pulled up in the car park, I resolved to ignore him from now on, regardless of how he was looking at me the last time I saw him. Regardless of the way it felt to kiss him. Regardless of the fact that my stomach seemed to flip every time I thought about him. I resisted the urge to slap myself for getting lost on a tangent when I needed to be focussing on my performance later today.

I pulled my bag full of costumes out of the car, hauling it through the stage door and into the familiar dressing room. I set up my things and then went over to where everyone was crowded around Mrs Jones as she gave out final notes about the performance. She reeled off a list of criticism then finished with a crisp 'Good Luck ladies'.

Mrs Jones then walked over to me and said 'Eleanor, since you've been at this school a long time I trust you know where everything is by now. Can you show Shawn around now before the show starts?'

It was less of a question than a demand, and I knew that I couldn't decline or Mrs Jones would ask questions, despite the way my stomach dropped at the idea of it. I just nodded my head and stuttered 'Okay.'

Mrs Jones called Shawn over and said 'Eleanor will be showing you around the theatre now so that you know where everything is when the show starts.'

At this Shawn cleared his throat uncomfortably but didn't say anything, and I pretended not to notice and walked over to the sound shell. I opened the door and walked into the room and waited for him to follow me. He came through the door behind me and I started showing him all the equipment. As I rambled on, he interrupted me, quietly saying my name. I pretended not to hear it and continued talking, all the while avoiding his powerful gaze, but this time he said it louder.

'What?' I snapped, resigned.

'I'm sorry.'

I stared blankly at him, waiting for further explanation.

'I shouldn't have just driven off like that, I was...I was confused' he said vaguely, running a hand through his hair. This still didn't make any sense. Was this his idea of an explanation?

'I don't-I don't understand,' I said, growing more frustrated as I waited for him to explain properly.

'What I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry for all of it. I felt like an asshole for driving off, and I felt like even more of an asshole for kissing you when you were clearly not well and just in need of a ride home.'

'Then why did you?' I heard myself say, the words blurting out before I could even think about how to respond. Part of me needed to know, had he felt the same thing that I had?

'I dont know.' He answered honestly, his dark eyes burning into my blue ones. 

His fingers traced so lightly along my arm that I almost thought I had imagined the touch. But even so, my whole body seemed to light up, nerves filling my stomach. I watched the way his expression changed, and the way his features softened, and I lost my train of thought, eyes still locked on his. Without even thinking about what I was doing, I found myself leaning closer to him. Our faces were just inches from each other, and he was so close that his body was almost pressed against mine.