Absence - Lemonade - Jeremy Passion
"Fragile broken thing.
Faded memoire thou bringest.
Wilst I see thy
sillhouette?
Wilst thy physique shalt I embrace?
Kisses shalt I taste?
Wilst thy love fate forbid?
Loving thee like a lemonade , sour without thy sweetness.
Coldest amidst the hot summer breeze.
My Belle, does thou exist?
Oh Belle, shalt I see thee?"
Hurt was painted in my face as I closed the book. Hindi ko maatim na tapusin ang pagbasa ng librong akin namang isinulat. At kailanman di ko iyon muling babasahin pa. Yes, the book was a big success but how could I read something that would only remind me of good memories. Magagandang alaala na kailanman di ko na mararanasan pang muli.
Napabuntong-hininga nalang ako at pilit kong ipinikit ang aking mga mata habang nakahiga sa aking king sized bed. Unan ko sa pagtulog ang mga bote ng alak na siyang nagbibigay ng hindi permanenteng pagkalimot kasama ang mga sigarilyong pilit na humihigop sa aking permanenteng kalungkutan.
"Elle..Asan ka na? It's been five years Elle...",I whispered while drinking the last drop of alcohol on my glass.
Muli na naman akong napapikit at kumawala ang matagal ko nang itinatagong mga luha. Memories started rushing into my senses of how we met five years ago.I started recalling how a cold hearted, egoistic human was changed by an unknown but eventually created a monster in me after the abandonment, a beter-off-dead monster.
"THIS IS rubish Dale! Ano to? The publication is giving you a high rate and all we get is this? This is pure cliche! Ewan ko ba kung bakit ka pa na-hire ng companyang ito despite your incapabilities! You're such a poor writer. Pabalik-balik na lang ang mga plots mo,cliffhangers and thrillers. Goodness! Five years ka nang nagsusulat dito,five years of your redundant novels!"
Napatungo na lamang ako sa sinabi ng aking editor na si Lorette. Kung hindi ko lang kailangan ang trabahong ito ay hindi ako magdadalawang isip na magresign.Hindi naman lingid sa kaalaman ko na flunking na ang publication na iyon at dahil wala talaga akong ibang alam na trabaho ay ito nalang ang aking pinagtatiyagaan.Incapability is an understatement! How could someone criticize a writer's work with all cruelty and inconsiderateness? I aimed of expressing but ironically, these publications only wanted to gain good impressions, which is an inevitable fact I could never argue.
"Dale Albert Ricarte! Where are you going! Wait... I could fire you for insubordination you asdfgjadsfakdkadlasdfgh!"
May sinasabi pa ang editor pero di ko na napigilang umalis. Pasigaw akong tinawag nito ngunit nagpakabingi ako.
"Para siyang si mom at dad. What a nagging slut.", I said to myself and smirked. I puffed my cigarette and umalis sa napakalaking building na iyon.
I was twenty back then.
Enjoying the leisures youth could offer. Women, liquors, cars, rides and money. I almost had everything. But despite the joy, I had this independent rebel intinct of me that forced my parents to despise me. Umalis ako ng bahay out of insolence.
"Damn it! Watch your steps woman!...Darn! Why do women had to be so clumsy?!",bigla na lang kasing may isang babaing muntikan nang mapadapa. Buti nalang at nasalo ko ito. Agad naman itong umayos sa pagtayo.
