//four - losing all control//

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Josh's POV
By the time we were back at the house, Laney had fallen asleep in the back seat with her head propped against the slightly tinted window. She still barely ate, filling me with fear, but I tried desperately to ignore it. I could tell Tyler was bothered too, but he's so much better at not showing emotion. That scared me about him sometimes, though. I could never tell when something was wrong.

After Tyler parked in the deep, forest-covered driveway, I walked to the back and carried Laney into the house and up the stairs, dropping her on the bed of our guest room. It was sandwiched between Tyler's room and my room with the bathroom across the small hallway.

I closed the door softly and walked back down to see Tyler sitting on the couch, lost in thought. That was never good.

"You good, Ty?" I asked quietly as I got closer to his spot on the couch and gently plopped down next to him.

"Yea, I'm fine. I just don't know what to do for her, Josh." I knew I wasn't the only one worrying. "I mean, her dad was awful to her, used her. She could be sick. She doesn't eat, correction, can't eat. She has nightmares, hurts herself. Her whole world turned against her and I don't know how to help." I saw Tyler's thoughts spinning out of control completely as he hid his face in his hands. He always got worked up about stuff by overthinking, just like I did. But, I had to be there for him this time.

"Then we make a plan. We tell her about it, make sure she wants to work through it with us. If she does, great. If she doesn't, then we just be here for her and try to convince her." I could see him try to calm himself down and think through my idea. The room was comfortably silent as we thought through it all. Finally, he nodded.

"Okay. So, where do we start?"

From there, we planned out how to properly take care of Laney. We decided first to take her to a doctor to make sure she was healthy after everything her dad did to her. She mentioned the abuse, all the kinds of abuse, so it was priority. Then, we'd also check out her eating issues, working through possible medications to help her with everything. After that, we would just have to see what happened.

All of the worry seemed to melt away a bit. Now, we just had to hope she'd work with us.

Laney's POV
I woke up to the door of what I assumed to be my new room closing gently. I must have fallen asleep in the car from the restaurant.

Eating in front of Tyler and Josh was nerve wracking. I could see that they both are trying to see how much I was eating and taking note of it. I felt like I was on an operating table as they poked and prodded into all my insecurities. I didn't blame them, they wanted the best for me. But, the more people point out what's wrong, the less capable you feel of getting better.

I rolled over on my side and saw my phone sprawled on the cream-colored comforter. I pressed it as the screen lit up with a reply to the text I sent last night.

My best friend's name was Alex, but he always told me to call him Al. He was the only person I had for so long, and my stomach threw around my last meal at the thought of me trying to leave him like I wanted to.

His reply seemed concerned, like all of his replies anymore. I opened the text to read all of it.

Alex: i hope everything's okay, lane. you mean so much to me, without you, i'd be nothing. please talk to me if you need me and call and i'll be there.

Tears filled my eyes as I read his response. I was such an evil bitch. It would've killed him.

All I do is mess up.

Maybe my dad was right. Maybe I was nothing.

None of this feels right still.

I still want to die.

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