Dear Katherine

I hate that I love your smile

Dear Katherine,

     Two weeks before school ended, I caught myself thinking about you again and thought “what are you doing, man?” because lately you were practically the only thing that occupied my mind. I was worse than a thirteen-year-old girl addicted to One Direction. I wasn’t even doing well in basketball lately since my head wasn’t in the game. My head was in the clouds and my heart was yours.

I’m a cheesy bastard.

     And I didn’t know why, but when I thought about you, I couldn’t go three seconds without stupid butterflies rumbling about in my midsection. And I had thought “hmph so all those love songs are true. You do get butterlies in your stomach.”

     And one day after basketball practice, all of us boys were eating and talking about girls and stuff when Paul—you know, the guy who always had to drink gatorade and pee a fountain before a big game—suddenly brought you up.

     “What do you think about Katrina Dawson?” he had asked as he chewed his food obnoxiously.

     “It’s Katherine, dude,” I corrected him.

     “Okay Katherine Dawson,” he said.

     “I don’t know much about her,” one of boys had said.

     “She’s too quiet. She should just loosen up a little.”

     “I have no idea who that chick is.”

     “She’s definitely one of the prettier girls in school, but she doesn’t flaunt it. And she reminds me way too much of that flowerchild from glee.”

     “Jon?” someone asked me.

     “Uh, she’s cool,” had been my only response.

     “Aw come on, we know you have more to say than that. We see you two talking in the halls every morning!”

     “She… she’s shy, but she’s really awesome.”

     “Vague bastard.”

     “Would you date her?”

     “What kind of a question is that?!” I had asked.

     “No we’re getting to the bottom line here, dude. Would. You. Date her?”

     Most of the guys were shrugging and saying “if I really liked her, why not?” and I was just like “maybe, I don’t know.” But really Kath, inside I was like “of course I would! I would give anything to date her!” And that was the truth.

You know, you have a really big effect on me. I think I remember one day while I was talking to you, you smiled and so I told you a joke, and then you laughed. And from that day forwards, I told myself that I would always try to make you smile or laugh and that I would never hurt you or make you cry.

But lately, it’s been the other way around.

     I just loved your smile, okay? I still do, actually.

     It triggers something in me that nothing else can.

     Forever yours,

     Jonathan.