Ok I know I said it in the first page that people tease me about My Gender. People see me as a girl sometimes and other times as a boy, in public area's like church. When I go to church the first thing a person says across the room is "is that a boy or a girl",and usually people laugh it off or give me strange looks to tell by chest if I'm a girl or not.
Well at the age of 10 ( I think I was younger IDK ) I went through a phase. This phase lasted until I was 12( I think) anyways this phase was me wearing caps ,oversized shirts with gym shoes, including my hair up to my shoulders. I guess I thought it was "cool" to wear that kind of stuff , but sometimes I would have my hair in a ponytail because that time I didn't want to cut my hair so I did it up alot in a ponytail which look like I was a boy. When 4th grade came I was builled somewhat with questions like "hey you think that boy is a girl or is that actually a girl" or " hahha she might be lesbian", which I'm not offended by that question because there's nothing wrong with being gay or being called it (I support it!!). I felt very depressed so I decide to dress like my gender , to follow the rules like a doll traped in a doll house becoming what she's meant to be a "perfect Baribe Doll".
Other reason I had to be my gender was because of my grandma. She loves me to death and all ,but ok let me clear about this so my grandma is mexican so some mexicans want their kids or grand kids to act like their gender. What had happened was I thought she wouldn't love me for who I am from me dressing as the opposite gender , I was afraid of rejection back then (I'm still scared of it now ) I thought people would like me more if I dressed my grender along with my grandma loving me for my gender ,but to be someone I was not.

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In 5th grade my hair grew with me doing buns in my hair , I had the same hair as this picture . I was someone else , that I couldn't stand of how I looked in the mirror being that person in some doll house ...I hated it by following some rule of being a doll with her "perfect" looks of a girl.
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6th grade came, then I discovered something. My grandma let other people like me into her life cause she loves them for who they are, I learned it was ok to be me as long as I'm happy with the way I dress. I've been playing the wrong role to play , time changed I cut my long hair up to my neck and later on dyed it to red now ( my bangs are colored , the back is my original hair color) . Today I can finally be me by playing both the boy and the girl , every time I wake up first thing comes to mind " what will I be today" this is what I look foward everyday now because I can be me without having to be miserable for what I look or wear.
I worked out everything with my grandma , she was surprised and yet happy for being me. I'm all right now ,but I learned not to care of what people think of me.
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