Within the Forest (Werewolf Solangelo AU)

Chapter Forty-Six: I miss him

Will's POV (Look how productive! Proud of me?)

Having Nico not around is... Stressful? Is that the right word? No. No not that. Aggravating? No.. Driving me insane? ... Maybe. I haven't been able to sleep. Well, more like Sol won't let me sleep. I honestly don't want to. My greatest fear so far is to fall asleep and wake up colorblind. That thought alone is probably a big reason why Sol won't let me sleep.

But that's something that has given me some kind of relief. I'm not colorblind. As long as I see color, we can still find Nico alive. And that's probably the only thing keeping Sol sane. Good thing too. Despite Sol's craziness, people are still in heat. We can't have Sol killing off the pack before they even make pups to replace them.

Sol's still been unresponsive. Sometimes I find myself making myself depressed just trying to get him to talk to me. I thought I'd be glad not to hear him always commenting and judging my every movement. Not only has he went as far as to control my movements entirely, he doesn't even answer the small questions I ask him. Even if Sol has been annoying in the past, he's still a part of me. And haven't him not respond for so long.. It's a bit scary.

It's come to the point where we're positive he's not in pack territory. Any trace of his scent here is faint so he must have been gone for awhile. I groaned at that thought. My Nico in another pack territory. I am not afraid to kill every other pack in this area just to get Nico back. That thought made Sol give some kind of rumbling sound. He agrees.

My old bedroom. That's the only place in the house that has his scent the most. All those days he's been hidden in here from my parents. All my stuff he's moved around just for the sake of making the room look.. Well not like a tornado just tore threw it. Where I slept on the floor just so he'll be comfortable. Where I bit my father for the second time in an attempt to protect him. Was this where I first kissed him? So much happened in this room. I don't even remember anymore.

Not having Nico here is like my own personal hell. The only way Sol can cope is my throwing things that are guaranteed to break against a wall. I have to say, hearing plates and cups shatter is pretty satisfying, but then I remember I'm going to have to clean up. Not so great. I have small scars on my hands from cutting them on broken glass. Seeing my own blood is a bit.. Satisfying too. But I never bother doing anything that involves that. When my stress gets really bad, I chew on ice until I get a brain freeze. That.. Helps.

I'm considering going to the other packs for help. Sol's been talking with Cecil and Lou Ellen, when they're not locked in a closet to prevent Sol from bursting in again even though Sol truly didn't give two shits, about maybe sending search parties to try to find any clues that Nico's there. The thought of him being anywhere but the South pack scares the crap out of me, as I've mentioned several times before (Bye forth wall..), but if he is there then we need to get him. I just...

I miss him so much....