Girl in Pain | {old version}

Chapter 14

❝All suffering originates from craving, from attachment, from desire.❞

-Edgar Allan Poe

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Winter break was over and school had started a week ago but even if I was full of homework, these past days had been lonelier than ever for me. It had been a while since I last felt this emptiness, that I was clueless, lost.

The lessons were boring, not even English literature and physical education did cheer me up a bit like in the past; monotones voices surrounded me. Sometimes I heard people laugh in the distance but I couldn't understand how they could be happy, how they did it.

I felt like dead.

People thought I didn't notice when they were whispering behind my back as I walked by in the hallways. But feeling empty and numb doesn't mean you lose your ability to hear, to reason. Some looked at me with pitiful eyes, others with those disgusting glances as always. This time though, I held my head high while ignoring them.

Even my afternoons spent in the library didn't bring me any joy; I couldn't feel the passion that I felt months ago reading all those books and stories. They didn't bring me to forget the reality like they used to and transport me to places unknown to others but for me. Everything has been completely indifferent to my eyes. The same way as it was before I met him.

Him...

At his thought, a memory flooded through my mind before I could stop it.

A dim light entered the room making me shift my position to avoid it. I felt strong arms around my waist holding me close to a hard chest while I slowly turned around. A small smile appeared on my lips and I slowly opened my eyes to find him still in the world of dreams. His face was so peaceful while he slept that no one could have ever guessed what nightmares he went through. Taking in the sight in front of me I pressed a hand on his chest, exactly where his heart was. It was beating a bit faster than normal and pretty soon he stirred, engulfing me closer to him. He mumbled something in his sleep and I couldn't resist the urge to chuckle. He slowly opened his eyes fluttering his eyelashes and then looked me straight in the eyes.

"Good morning O." he whispered in a husky voice and I answered with a simple 'Hi' hiding in his chest. We stayed in that position for a long time without anyone rushing us or disturbing one of the few moments of peace we could share. His father had kept him busy during daylight since the winter break started so, besides Christmas itself, we had had time to see each other just at night time.

This was the third time that he spent the night with me and what I loved most of it was the feeling I felt every time I woke up with him next to me. I felt safe in his arms and every time he looked at me I felt a warm feeling spreading through my body. It was as if he was protecting me from the outside world, from the storm, but at the same time being the fuel to my flames.

I slowly lifted myself on the elbows and looked him straight in the eyes losing myself once again in those black orbits. They were like a magnet, attracting me every time as if it was the first, making me feel things I never thought I would ever feel again...

"Cole?"

"Yes O?" he replied questioningly while studying my face again.

"I'm happy."

He focused his gaze on mine and with a smile, on his lips he took me by my hips making me squeal. A heart-warming laugh was heard and at the same time he put me on his belly; even from there I could feel his defined abs and without hesitation, I placed my hands on his thorax and started drawing imaginary figures. A purr of content left his lips and soon we found ourselves engulfed in a passionate make-out session.