Lea POV
"What you thinking about ?" I asked making Riker laugh "nothing, why ?"
"Something's bothering you, I can tell. Normally when you go to bed as soon as your head hits that pillow you're asleep, you're quiet and everybody knows when you're quiet you're a time bomb." I said leaning up on my elbow, moving the hair off of his face "I miss your short hair."
"Did you not see how long my hair was ?" Riker asked making me nod, I loved his hair like that, it was sexy but Riker's younger days like 2014 hair, the 'Bieber' style hair was good, shirt at the back and long at the front.
"I liked it that way, but when you were younger it made you look so innocent but it was like a sexy innocent, it made you look like the guys your parents want you to date when in reality you were the guys they wanted you to fun away from, it was hiding all this, I love you nose." I said making us both laugh.
Riker is very good at dressing up for things, if he has to go somewhere dressed smartly he will dress like he owns his own business in a sky scrapper in New York. He gotta dress up for Halloween, his got it looking freaky. He can wear anything, look smart yet with a side of sexy. As his gotten older his figured it out.
"My nose ? Are you drunk ?" Riker asked.
He has the most adorable nose in the world, it's like a little baby nose but cuter "you have a cute nose, it's like you've still got your baby nose."
"I'm jealous of Ellington and Rydel." Riker sighed sitting up, running a hand through his hair "it's like now that I know for sure I can't have kids the more I want them, I love Greg and the twins more then anything in the world but we had this idea of the perfect family, it's just not going to happen. I'm happy for them but it's seeing them together and the way he looks at her or the way she looks at him or the fact that his going to there every single day for that child's life where as I somehow pulled the short fucking straw and miss out on everything."
"Baby relax your hands, you'll make yourself bleed." I whispered interlocking our fingers as he opened up his very red hands.
There it is. Everything his been bottling up. Everything his been denying himself. Everything he thinks on things, has finally got too much for him and before he realised it we had caught on something was wrong with him.
Yeah he was laughing earlier about things but something was just off, it didn't seem like him.
"This is why I don't want to do R5 anymore, I can't mentally do it not now there's kids involved." Riker whispered.
I sighed hugging him "well you're hardly going to do now are you ? Rydel's gonna be popping a baby out soon, she can't even tie her own laces I hardly think she's gonna wanna do a 2-3 hour show."
Riker shrugged "it's stupid, if we had sex before I left it wouldn't of been bad."
"I pushed out two fucking babies while your dumbass was passed out, if you think for one minute I would of let you touch me after all that you need help." I said making him laugh.
With things like this, there's no telling when it happened all we know is it happened around 18 months ago, it could of happened after the twins were born, it could of happened before they were, there isn't always an explanation to as why these things happen, sometimes they just do and clearly that's happened to Riker because I know in some cases the guy is born like it, he just can't get someone pregnant where as Riker clearly can get someone pregnant.
"I just feel like they've had their life together longer then I have, they've been dating for 4 years, they're married and now they're having kids. That's how it was supposed to be, that's how I always imagined it." Riker said.
I sighed resting my chin on his shoulder "Riker....if we did it like that and waited until we were married it would be a lot more painful finding out while we're trying for a baby, if we waited we....there would be no point." I whispered.
"Am I being stupid ? Am I overthinking things again ?" Riker asked looking at me, I laughed shaking my head "you're always stupid and no, you're not over thinking it, you're just letting it bother you and you wanna know a little secret ?"
"We're not replacing a baby with a dog." Riker laughed.
"What about a micro pig ?" I asked.
"Can't we just keep Ross here instead ?" Riker asked making me laugh. I love Micro pigs, their little faces and their feet, I like piggies.
"I'm joking, well I'm not but you never know I look at you the way Rydel looks at Ellington because you're never looking and that's the whole point of it because you're doing stuff that makes me smile or makes me go I'm the luckiest girl in the world, just because you can't see it doesn't mean it's not there-"
"Did you ever use that line on Liam's dick ?" Riker asked laughing, I laughed nodding my head "alright, I'll give you that one, that one was good."
"You know it." He said fist bumping me.
I smiled and hugged him "just think next time this year I'll be a Lynch."
Riker laughed looking at me "you've always been a Lynch, just like I've always been an Anderson."
"That just reminded me, at the wedding can we please not invite a crazy old lady ?" I asked.
"That really narrows it down for me, why don't you want them there ?" Riker said sarcastically.
"She walked up to me and was like oh where's your blond brother and I pointed to where you were standing because I could just see the back of you and I wasn't really paying attention, I just saw a blond guy talking in a suit and you turned around and she started like questioning me about it because obviously everyone knew who Greg was and it was like his not my brother, his siblings are my siblings but his not and I just kept talking making it worse." I said laughing.
Everyone has that habit of getting themselves into a awkward situation and then continuing to talk making it worse, you're a liar if you say that had never happened.
"I don't need the imagine of you being my sister-"
"Sarah's your sis-"
"Lea." Riker warned.
"I love that little smirk, you could pull any girl with that smirk." I said pecking his lips, Riker smiled laying me down "and somehow I got stuck with you."
"You can't help but love me." I smiled.
"Vain much ?" Riker asked.
I laughed sitting up "I'm the vain one ? Did you or did you not once say in an interview that if you were a girl you would date yourself ?" I asked making him nod "that's called having confidence honey, look it up."
"You're such a fucking weirdo but I still love you." I laughed kissing him.
