Gravity

Chapter 24: Talk To Me

Chapter 24

Talk To Me

            A day after Darren's and I's conversation, his words were still running circles through my mind. He told me to forget about the kiss, but I couldn't when I could still feel his lips against mine and his hand on the back of my neck pushing me into him. The way he kissed me with such ferocity didn't feel like someone who would soon regret the kiss. But, I supposed all those times I kissed Azazel he probably had no clue that I would eventually regret them. I couldn't get Darren to leave my mind and I realized I needed to talk to someone about it. I thought about talking to Sammy about it and getting an outsider's perspective, but when I got to our dorm room she was gone which was per usual. The only other person I could turn to was the only one who knew about the kiss, Joey. So I decided to throw him a surprise visit.

            I didn't bother to knock on the apartment door, instead I threw it open figuring there couldn't have been anything that bad that I could see, but I was wrong.

So wrong.

            "Brian?" My eyebrows furrowed together as I tried to comprehend the sight I was seeing.

"Sam?" My voice cracked as my eyes saw Brian's arm around her as they sat cuddling on the couch.

            "What?" I blinked, there was no way I was seeing this correctly. There was no way my brother had his arm around my friend, or ex friend now, or well Sammy. Sammy didn't like Brian. At least she never told me. We were supposed to be friends, why wouldn't she tell me something like this?

            I guess why haven't I told Brian that I liked Darren? But, that was different. I didn't like my friend's brother.

            "What the fuck is going on?" The anger came crashing in like waves and my voice rose louder than I had meant it to. But, I was really angry. Everything I had to be angry about was pouring through this small problem.

            "Uh, hey, Emily," Sammy's voice was soft and I knew she didn't mean anything by it, but I was still mad. She was supposed to be my friend. She was supposed to be my outsider perspective. She was supposed to be my one friend not connected to Brian, but now she was as connected as one could get.

            "Don't 'hey Emily' me," I groaned and glared at my brother as he refused to remove his arm from around her.

            "Is anyone going to explain to me what's going on here?" I was beyond angry now, I was pissed. I heard a door open and I knew that it was either Walker or Joey coming out to see who was yelling and why, but I didn't care who saw my outburst.

            "I'm sorry, Emily. I wanted to tell you, but Brian thought it was better to keep it a secret. He wanted to tell you when the time was right." I shook my head and turned my anger at Brian.

            "And when was the time going to be right?" I asked Brian and he finally pulled his arm back from Sam. He let out a sigh before speaking.

            "I guess now..." He hesitated with his answer knowing it was bad. I was so mad I could feel the tears form in my eyes.

            "Whatever," I turned around to leave, but I felt a hand on my arm stopping me.

            "Let. Me. Go." I growled.

            "Nope, not doing that Emmers," the voice instantly calmed me as I recognized it was Joey's, but I didn't want to be calm right now. Right now I wanted to scream and punch something. But, I allowed Joey to turn me back.

            "Come on, let's talk in my room," he said not giving me an option. I rolled my eyes, but obeyed considering that's the reason I came by in the first place.

            "Talk to me, Em," Joey said as I avoided his eyes. He had seen me cry way more than anyone ever had, but I couldn't break infront of him again. I refused to do it.

            "It's just...she's supposed to be my friend," I swallowed down the sobs threatening to escape, "And you know, every 'friend' I have has a tie to Brian and this was the one person I thought was with me just for me, but it turns out now she's dating my brother and it just...It hurts." I admitted and I didn't know why, but it was easy to talk to Joey and tell him my problems. I could trust him, because he was like a brother. I could tell him things and it seemed like he would always stay no matter what. And I liked the way how after I told him something he didn't judge me as hard as everyone else would.

            "And..." I trailed off recalling why I came in the first place. "Darren called me yesterday," I whispered still hurt from his words. "He apologized for kissing me, but," I shook my head at myself. Darren had apologized and I didn't just accept it, I should have accepted it.

            "But, he just made me feel worse. He said he's not telling Julia, because it doesn't matter since it meant nothing and he regretted it. Which I mean, I didn't want to kiss him that night, but I wouldn't say I regretted it or that it meant nothing. And it's just like nothing ever works out in my life. First Azazel and now I'm here," I rambled on and I was thankful for Joey and him letting me do that, because I needed to let it all out and it felt good to unload it all even if I was unloading it on him. He was silent for a minute not sure how to respond, but then he opened his mouth.

            "Just, because Sam's dating Brian doesn't mean she's not still your friend. Do you think Brian thinks that we all aren't his friend anymore, because you're our friend now? No, he doesn't. And just because we all know Brian doesn't mean we favor one over the other, but if we did have a favorite you'd be mine." He winked at me causing me to giggle. He seemed to make my mood change with just a look at his eyes; I wish I had allowed him into my life earlier.

            "I know, but it's still hard for me to comprehend..." I trailed off. I knew Joey was my friend, but what about everyone else? What about Darren? Darren, I told myself, isn't my friend. Which made me just want to fix it even more.

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A/N:

Hey guys. I don't know if you guys are Darren Criss fans or naw, I'm assuming you are cause you're here.
But even if you aren't I highly suggest checking Darren Criss' Instagram page because holy crap.

I'd post the picture but idk if I should.

.....

Screw it. Here's the photo.

Your innocence is gone.

Rip. Me.

That's all now.