Sad songs // KSIMON

IX

[Simon Minter]

I stared up at the ceiling, it felt as if it were taunting me, honestly. It was cheer a white but it cast such a grim darkness with the morning light just now seeping into the house.

Sighing, I checked my phone again.

As I have been every 5 mins consecutively for the past 4 hours.

It was driving me mental. JJ hasn't texted, DMed me, liked my post or even commented. Nothing. It's almost as if he just decided to vanish into thin air.

I hadn't even thought about texting or calling Amelia about yesterday, I was too busy pulling my brain apart thinking of ways to either go to sleep and not wake up crying about him or trying to get though to him.

"JJ, please." I whined out of not only my dying hope but just the tiredness of everything that had fallen upon me.

I curled onto my side faced toward my window as a let a few silent sobs finally escape.

I don't want to play games.
I don't want all this.
I just need my best friend.

I need him.

I recollected myself after a few minutes of me allowing my sobs to run free, wiping away tears as I perched myself on the edge of the bed.

Hanging my head I sighed and murmured to myself.

"What do I do?"

I was fresh out of ideas. I've tried everything to get though to him.

I got up and went to my dresser grabbing a 'SDMN' jumper out and slipping it over my bare torso.

Immediately as I put it on I resisted the urge to rip it back off.

It practically swallowed my top half and was much to big on me, nor did it smell of me.

Instead my nose was filled with the scent of cinnamon and cologne. A scent that I had grown to adore, and one that I endured often.

It was JJ's.

I smiled slightly at the comforting smell and warmth it gave me. A small knot tingling my stomach sending butterflies around me. I didn't know why that happened but I know I liked it.

I kept it on.

I spun to check the time on my clock as I grabbed a pair of shorts that had been thrown carelessly on top of my dresser.

5:24 am

I shrugged to myself, quietly making my way out of my room and across the hall toward JJ's room.

Once I got to the door, I managed to raise my hand slightly so that I could knock, but it's as if my mind snapped and next thing I knew I was sat pressed against the side of his door frame.

My side was leant against the crisp white door. My heart was on my sleeve and I just begged JJ would see my pain. All I wanted was for him to hug me and be with me and do things that best friends should do and comfort me.

Before you knew it tears were running down my face again. I buried myself in JJ's jumper, inhaling large amounts of his incredible scent and curled myself up.

Then silence followed.

It was thick and poison like.

After what felt like years of silence, a small noise managed to just make it completely disappear in just milliseconds.

The light scratchy sound of feet against carpet and the twist of a door handle was enough to make me scream internally.

But in a good way of course.

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