It Was One Time (OITNB Fanfiction)

Chapter 17 - It's Not Fucking Okay.

Clementine's POV: I woke up to the high ceilings of Litchfield, my heart sinking yet again when I realized I was trapped. I turned over onto my other side and on my pillow, I saw a giant roach "Aaah!" I screamed. Red immediately ran over to my bunk. I honestly felt really bad, nothing was that wrong and I made her get up. "What's wrong, Clementine?" She asked in her thick Russian accent. I grabbed my boot and squished the brown bug and said, "Nothing, Red. It's fine, go back to sleep." I said. "Are you sure?" She asked. "I just saw a roach and it startled me. I'm fine, thank you for getting up." I said. "No problem." She said. She walked back out of my bunk and into hers. I slipped back into bed and as soon as I could feel myself dozing off I felt someone shaking my shoulder. "Clementine...wake up." Renee said. "Don't call me Clementine.." I said. "Why?" She asked. "You're the one dose of reality I have in this prison." I remarked as I pull my boots on. She didn't respond. 

I walked into the crowded cafeteria to see that I was the first one there out of the people that sit at my table. Sitting alone was dreadful, but Big Boo got there soon to be my companion. "Morning, Boo." I said. "Morning. Have you heard the hot gos'?" She asked. "No?" I said. "Turns out the Vee girl, the new black in the prison has some history with Red. Anyway now she's back and she's been selling cigarettes to inmates for stamps." She said. "Wait, like, postage stamps?" I asked. "Yeah. So my question is, you got any stamps, Clementine?" She asked, with a hint of begging in her voice. "Boo I've been in here for a substantial about of time now and I still don't have conditioner. Does that answer your question?" I asked. She nodded and continued eating. I saw Nicky sit next to me "Morning." I said. "Well, aren't you perky." She remarked. I looked at her, confused. I tell her Good Morning every day. Renee sat down on the other side of me and laid her head on my shoulder. "Morning, ReeRee." I said. "Morning, Sarahbear." She said. "Hey! You killed my bug!" I heard from behind me. It was Rivera. "Oh! Rivera! Wait, what?" I said. "The roach. You killed him." She said. "It was in my bunk. I killed the roach. I didn't realize it was your pet." I said. "Well, he was my only companion, you owe me a new one." She said. "Where am I going to find a roach?" I asked. "Who knows. All I know is I ain't got no one else to hang with, so you better find me another damn bug." She said. "Well, okay. But, you can hang out with me." I said. "Where the fuck was that yesterday?" She asked. "What happened to you? You were candy sweet yesterday. All curious about my past relationship-" I was shocked that I had let that slip. I looked over at Nicky who was looking down at her tray, avoiding eye contact. "If you wanna sit with us you can." Morello said. Rivera looked down at her shoes. "Seriously, you're fine. Come chill with us." I said. She gave in and sat next to Boo. "Who is this?" Nicky said in between her teeth. "This is Lilly Rivera." I said. "Oh, Lilly!" She said in a sarcastically nice voice. I rolled my eyes and got up from the table to bus my tray. I didn't have time for whatever shit Nicky was going to pull with me right now. 

I walked over to the phones and dialed...555-224-1425. "An inmate from Litchfield is attempting to contact you" I heard from the phone. "Sarah?" I heard from over the phone. "Quinn." I said. "Hey. Listen I have to te-" "It's so amazing to hear your voice." I said. "Yours too, Sarah. Listen-" "I have so much to tell you!" I said. "Sarah!" She interrupted. "What?" I asked. "This is really hard to tell you, umm, Aunt Lauren passed away." She said. Everything felt silent. It was odd, I was aware people were talking but it was as if none of it was actually happening. Like I was dreaming. "Aunt Lauren?" I asked. "Yeah. I'm so sorry, Sarah." She said. "What happened?" I asked. "Well, mom went to go see her in the hospital. She was alive when mom left the house but somewhere between then and when mom got there the cancer took her." She said. "I was supposed to have more time. They said she had years ahead of her, that I had a chance of seeing her when I got out. She was gonna be fine!" I said in tears. "It spread to her brain, it was all so fast. I would've told you all this a few days ago but I didn't have a way." She replied. "Umm...when is the funeral?" I asked. "It's in a week." She said. "My god, I hate this fucking prison!" I shouted. "I-I'm sorry. I just wish I could attend." I said. "I get it, Sarah. We all wish you could be here too." She said through tears. "I-I have to go I'm running out of phone credits. Tell mom and dad I love them. Tell Jackson I miss him. Oh! And Quinn, I love you." I said. "I love you too." She said. 

I put the phone back on the wall and headed back to my bunk. I sat on my bed and stared into the space in front of me. My aunt was the coolest person you could have ever met. She was hilariously funny. She was kind. She was caring. She was everything you needed in someone and she was always there to listen. Whenever you were upset she wanted to understand. She never invalidated your feelings even when you were an irrationally angry eight year old she still wanted to know why you were irrationally angry. Soon I started to cry. And not the cute, Tumblr worthy tears that trail down your face. But the heaving sobs where your face turns all red and scrunches up, and you can't say anything and your nose is running. I covered my face with my hands and curled into a ball. I felt the mattress shift next to me. I honestly didn't care who was watching me right now, I just couldn't get my Aunt's beautiful smile out of head. "Clementine..." I heard. "What." I said sharply. "I didn't mean to act that way at lunch. If I would've known it would mess you up this much I would've-" You're not the reason im sobbing, Nicky!" I yelled. She flinched back as I shouted the words. "My aunt died." I said. "Oh. I..I'm sorry." She said. "Yeah. Well, I'd say its okay but its fucking not. She was gonna live. She was gonna live until I got out of this hell hole. But, now its too late. I got high once and now I can't go to my own aunt's fucking funeral and I have to stay here for 5 and a half more fucking years!" I screamed. I got up and started pacing. Trying to figure out how to get out all this built up rage. I could see Nicky was uneasy. Which was understandable, she'd never seen me like this. I went to the back of the bunk and kicked the stone wall. "Ow!" I said. But I kicked it again, and again, until I felt Nicky hug me from behind and guide me back to the. She sat down and I laid in her lap. "I was gonna be there to say goodbye." I whispered. "I know..." She said while stroking my hair comfortingly. And so we sat there. Neither of us had to work that day. So we sat there until lunch.