One Extra Life, Please. [Dazai x Reader]

Chapter 2: The Port Mafia's Woman

Dazai's P.O.V

"Kunikida!" I grinned. The man cast an annoyed look my way.

"Dazai, please, We don't have time for this. We need to stay on schedule so we can go grab the brat at the right time." Kunikida insisted sternly.

"Kunikida." I continued sweetly.

"What is it, Dazai?" He asked in a strained voice. I slid his 'ideals' book towards him on the table

"I know I've told you before, but your ideal woman is—" I held my nose and waved a make-believe scent away.

"When did you-" Kunikida cut himself off as he sighed and took the book from me, sticking it in his jacket.

"Ranpo, stay here with Tanizaki. You two are the most useful in a close catch, so we'll call you if we need to. Dazai. You will be coming with me to save the brat." He went on casually, ignoring my past comment.

Ranpo laughed from the other side of the room, saying, "Of course you'd only call me when you were in danger, I mean who else would be able to help?".

Tanizaki rolled his eyes.

"Anyone else." Kunikida replied nonchalantly, levelling out some papers on his desk.

Everyone laughed.

"Ah, who knows, maybe I'll meet a beautiful woman willing to commit double suicide with me there," I said dreamily, clasping my hands together

"Doubt it." Kunikida answered. I put a hand up to my heart and sighed dramatically.

"What a dream crusher!" I exclaimed

"Whatever, it's time to go."

•

"Atsushi's location is an abandoned warehouse building by the ocean, by 4th street."

I nodded, spying a certain black-haired man strolling from between 2 warehouses. A small noise of disgust escaped my lips as I mumbled out, "Of course he had to show up."

"Alright, it doesn't matter. That just means we have to plan how we do this more carefully now— hey, Dazai!" Kunikida whisper yelled, as I'd gotten up and was on my way over to Akutagawa.

He looked surprised when he saw me, as expected.

"Before you do anything, I didn't come here to fight. And I know that you know that." I said, smiling as my eyes bored into him.

Akutagawa hesitated, but only for a moment until trying to impale me with Rashomon. I was given a quick chance to jump back and avoid it, so I took it.

"Better than last time, you're improving!" I gave him a quick thumbs-up.

"Stop mocking me!"

I smiled and answered in a high voice, "Stop mocking me!"

Akutagawa's face twisted in anger.

"Now, let's not get angry." I snickered to myself, thoroughly enjoying this situation.

"Weak people like you should just die!" He jumped at me, his hands reaching out to grab me.

I resisted laughing more at his attempts as I stepped to the side, my fingers gripping his jacket.

"People die because they're strong people that've had enough."

I took the chance to punch Akutagawa in the side of the head, making him groan as his body went limp. I kept my grip on his jacket as I lowered him to the ground.

I sighed.

I heard a different set of footsteps running towards me, so I looked up and was met with a very agitated Kunikida.

"Dazai, you reckless bastard! Do you have any idea how risky that was to the mission?" Kunikida scolded, running towards me.

I gave him a look and shrugged, "It worked didn't it?"

Kunikida sighed and slightly turned up his nose in disgust.

"Oh, you did this to poor Akutagawa-Kun?" A feminine voice asked.

I turned around quickly, a feeling of fear bubbling in my gut.

I didn't sense her coming up.

"Oh, what? Are you scared Dazai? Did I surprise you?" She asked sweetly, giving me a smug look as her hands draped over Akutagawa's body.

I bit my lip nervously.

"Hm? Sorry I couldn't hear you over the fact I didn't hear you coming." I joked half-heartedly, a borderline worried lining my voice and becoming present.

The woman giggled but exhaled and smiled up at us.

I snuck a glance at Akutagawa, who was on the ground a few feet away, out like a light.

"Say, I just had a great idea. How would you like to go somewhere, Dazai?" The woman asked, sending me yet another sweet smile.

"No, I'm good thanks-"

The woman spun her finger and everything went black.

•

EDITED: 6/18/17

Editors note: see I'm editing this for the second time on 8/18/17 I'm being productive

Editor's note numero dos: I don't speak Spanish don't hate me lol. Edited again on 10/15/17

note de l'éditeur numéro trois: ha i knew taking French would pay off somehow. edited again on 5/18/18