IMPERFECT • JIKOOK

be

And I wasn't able

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The orange-haired boy groaned on his bed for the tenth time already. He already had been kicking anything his legs came close to, throwing anything either of his hands touched, and hitting his head repeatedly onto the wall with a scream for the past three hours. It had been two days already yet he couldn't forget about it.

Jimin couldn't forget about the kiss.

The kiss that had shattered his already shattered heart to even more tiny pieces and had left him with so many questions he never had answers in the first place.

He didn't know what the younger had thought when he'd kissed him.

Jungkook was his cousin, but they had kissed.

No. The boy had kissed him.

And it was making his insides whirl in guilt and shame and whatnot. That wasn't what blood-related people were supposed to do. That was very wrong; a mistake; sin.

Jimin gulped as he thought about sinning and shook his head, slightly smiling to convince himself that that was okay even if it was not.

After he'd shouted at the younger for what happened, he'd stormed his way out of the place with fury in his heart. He thought that Jungkook was just playing with his feelings and making him more miserable than he already was. He hadn't gone to their tutoring sessions since that. Jimin hadn't answered Jungkook's calls and texts. And whenever the younger went to Jimin's classes to talk, Jimin avoided him and hid.

He wasn't upset. He was outraged.

His friend, Yoongi, was not making him feel any better, too. The elder had been avoiding him and trying not to make any eye contact with him in classes they were together.

You could say that Jimin had fucked up his life real bad.

Suddenly, his phone beeped. There was a message from his mom that told him to come to the hospital as soon as he could.

Seulgi must have woken up! he thought.

Fixing his hair, he hoisted his body up to stand on his feet. He grabbed his sweater and covered his bare upper body with it. He finally went outside the house and saw that it was already dark, shivering at the cold night weather. He pulled his bike that was leaning on the fences and jumped on it, already making his way to the hospital to visit his little sister again.

The wind blew against his face stark mad, but he didn't care. His hair went flying up in the opposite direction as he pumped his legs faster to get to the place real quick and to finally see his sister. Arriving, he got out of his bike and threw it somewhere as he ran inside. He hoped to see his sister at least moving her pinkie or even opening her eyes. Or say his name. He hoped to see her calling him by his nickname again.

"ChimChim-oppa."

And little Seulgi would smile at him and hug him.

His lips curved upwards at the imagination.

But that little hope to see her shattered right before his eyes when he saw that the door of her suite was already opened. A few nurses were coming out the room with gloomy faces.

He felt his heart stopping as he finally entered the room and saw his mother's shaking back and beside her was the bed where Seulgi was supposed to be lying on, but no. The bed was still there, but it had already been covered by a white cloth. And Jimin swore to himself that very moment that he hated the color white.

He dragged his feet towards his sobbing mother and hugged her from behind, tears instantly making their appearance on his face.

"S-shes... gone," his mother muttered, low enough for him to hear, but loud enough for his heart to shatter all over again.