Twice The Love, Twice The Hate. I Just Had To Fall For Twins.

Twice The Love, Twice The Hate. I Just Had To Fall For Twins. {22}

                We pulled away from each other and smiled softly. Luna bit her lip. “I have to go find Newt,” she said, and I detected a bit of nervousness in her voice. Why was she nervous? I looked into her eyes and saw g-

                Guilt.

                Because she was my brother’s boyfriend, and I had just kissed her.

                Guilt tore through me, making me cringe as Luna got up. Oh god. Shawn. I had just kissed his girlfriend. He was going to be so upset. So…so…so hurt. He was always so kind to me and so protective, and I had just fucked him over.

                My wrists began to tingle the way they always did when I thought about cutting them. I had to tell Shawn I had kissed Luna. I had to be honest with him. We never kept secrets, especially not of this importance. God I was such a terrible person.

                But he would be so mad and so hurt. I couldn’t. I didn’t want him to be mad at me. I just couldn’t stand it. He would hate me. I’d rather let myself be destroyed by guilt than hurt my big brother that bad. I mean, he had even just told me how much he really liked Luna, and then I go off and kiss her. I deserved to die. I was a terrible person.

                Luna walked inside the school and I leaned back against the wall, hating myself. “I’m a terrible person,” I whispered. No wonder my dad didn’t love me. I didn’t deserve Shawn’s love, either. He had always watched out for me and taken care of me, and I repay the favor by kissing his girlfriend. I hated myself deeply.

                                                                                ***Shawn’s POV***

                “No, Shane, no,” I whispered as I watched him lean closer to Luna. Their lips pressed together and I clenched my fists tightly. That stupid fucking bitch. I’d kill her.

                Thank god I had dated her before Shane had managed up the courage to ask her out. If she could cheat on me like this, she could easily cheat on Shane. He would’ve been destroyed by it. I didn’t give two shits for Luna, though. She could cheat on me all she fucking wanted. As long as she didn’t hurt my brother, I didn’t care.

                But now she was getting through to him. She was going to play his heart. But I wouldn’t let that happen. I forced myself to get under control as she got up to head back inside. I had to stay with her, so that I could break her and get her away from my little brother.

                I backed away and Luna walked into the school. “Hey Luna!” I said, walking up to her. “Is Shane okay?” I asked, truly concerned. She blushed and nodded. “Yea, Shawn. He’s okay. I think he just wants to be alone.”

                I moved to her and kissed her. She didn’t kiss me back, though. I pulled away and smiled at her. “Hey, why don’t you come over afterschool?” I asked cheerfully. “Uh…sure Shawn,” she said nervously, guilt clear in her eyes.

                So afterschool, we all came back to our house, Type included. Shane was deathly pale and refused to look at, or talk to me.

                “Shane, what happened to you?” mom asked in concern as we walked into the house. The slushie was dried on his shirt and a little was caked in his hair. He had tried to wash it out in the bathroom, but had missed some.

                “Uh…so-someone sp-spilled it on accident,” he lied nervously. Mom could obviously tell he was lying. Her eyes grew pained but she nodded. She knew he would never tell her he was being picked on.

                “Well, let me wash it before the stain sets,” she said and he pulled his shirt off and handed it to mom. Luna blushed and looked away from his topless self. Shane was incredibly thin, and his ribs were poking through. But he had a slight 6 pack going for him. He and I worked out together sometimes.

                Yet no matter how strong he got, he just always seemed so fragile. He always had, even before he had been attacked. He was breakable. I wasn’t. It was just something odd about us that everyone could tell.

                “The fuck is in your hair?” dad asked, coming into the room and staring at Shane. He was slightly drunk, but not too bad. “Ben! Watch your language!” mom snapped, but he ignored her. She glared at him before leaving to wash Shane’s shirt.

                “Uh…sl-sl-slushie,” Shane said quietly. “Come on Luna; let’s go upstairs,” I said and kissed her. Dad glanced at us then glanced back at Shane. He opened his mouth but then snapped it shut. “Wash it out,” he growled before going into the kitchen.

                I went upstairs with Luna while Type and Shane went into the living room together. We sat on the top bunk and I kissed Luna again, hating her yet knowing I needed to make her fall in love with me.

                “Listen, we should go on a date this weekend to the movies or something,” I said with a smile, knowing Shane was working this weekend. Luna smiled nervously. “Okay, Shawn,” she said with a nod before falling silent again.

                “And we could go get dinner,” I added as an afterthought. Then Shane could see us being all romantic and shit, and he wouldn’t kiss her again. She may be corrupting my little brother, but not for much longer. She was fucking with his head. He would never do something this to me, because he would be too afraid to hurt me. Luna was toying with him. He was putty in her hands, and I wasn’t going to let things stay that way.

                I kissed Luna and smiled sweetly at her. I opened my mouth to say something to her, but was cut off by my dad’s terrified shriek of “SHANE!”.