After a while I heard a knock along with a voice say, "Rowan? It's me. Open up. I'm alone."
I opened the door to reveal a figure.
"Come in." I said opening the door so the boy could slip through.
We sat on the floor across from each other. There was awkward silence, but I broke it eventually. "I have to ask. Why did you kiss me?"
Peyton scratched the back of his neck. He furrowed his eyebrows together thinking carefully before he replied. It looked as if he didn't want to mess it up anymore than he had.
"I just got caught up in the moment. And I used to have a crush on you, so I guess that impacted it too. Also, you and Corey are so cute and I wanted that for Sabrina and I, but she hates to show affection."
I looked down into my lap. Should I forgive him? He hasn't even apologized.
"Okay."
"And look, Rowan, I'm really sorry. Nothing like that will ever happen again and I just want everything to go back to the way it was. I don't like you like that. And I understand what you and Corey have. I'm so sorry." he said softly.
"Okay, well um. I forgive you." I whispered.
"Thank you," he said leaning over and pulling me into a hug. I felt as if a part of me missing was back again. Just then the door swung open letting all the light into the confined space.
I pulled away from Peyton and turned around to see Corey standing there.
"Unbelievable." he scoffed before turning and walking away. I got up and ran after him.
I finally caught him in the parking lot.
"Corey! Corey! Slow down! What's the matter with you?" I said before he finally turned around.
"What's the matter? Maybe it's the fact that my own girlfriend hid from me, ignored me, and went to him for comfort instead of me? Rowan, I had no idea where you were! I thought you could have been hurting yourself!"
The cast and crew were gathering around and watching because he was screaming so loud. I could feel the burning sensation of my tears falling down my cheeks.
"I was sick to my stomach for the past hours worrying about you! But I come to find that you're in a closet with Peyton hugging?"
"Corey I-"
"No I just can't." he said burying his face in his hands.
"Can't what?"
"Do this anymore." he said looking me directly in the eyes. I felt my body go numb, but I was strong enough to keep it up.
He turned around and went into his trailer. But I couldn't move, I was paralyzed. I felt my legs shake, and my body collapsed on the pavement. I curled into and ball and started sobbing.
Why wasn't I strong enough. I'd never be strong enough, I'll never be good enough.
I felt a pair of arms try to lift me, but I pushed them away. I wanted to be alone, but how could I be in the middle of a parking lot where everyone just watched me get dumped.
I looked over at his trailer. I saw him through the window, crying. I looked away. I didn't want to see his face anymore.
I felt a hand push the hair out of my face. Corey kept me strong, and without him? I was nothing.
"Rowan come on. Let's go to your trailer." they said helping me to my feet. I got up, but my legs wouldn't move. I fell to my knees.
They helped me up again, and I was able to make it back. When I got inside I collapsed on my couch.
"I need to be alone." I cried.
"Okay," Sabrina said softly. I heard the door shut behind her. I got up and looked around.
There were photographs of us everywhere. But there wasn't an us anymore.
I got up and picked up the glass frame in my hand. It was a picture of us after the last day of season three.
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It was my favorite picture of us. I treasured it dearly. I took it and smashed it again the wall. Pieces of glass fell everywhere.
I did the same with the other photo frames, leaving my trailer a mess as it was once before. I had trashed it.
I heard a knock on the door.
"Rowan, it's Sabrina again."
"Come in," I said quietly.
The door opened and she stopped in shock when she saw the mess I had left.
"Rowan! Oh my god, your feet!"
I looked down and saw pieces of glass stuck in the bottom of my feet. I never really noticed. I guess pain didn't bother me anymore, since I had felt it so much. Maybe I was used to it.
"It's okay," I said quietly.
"No we have to go take it out!" she said picking me up bridal style and running to the set Doctor.
Blood was dripping as she ran. I was surprised she was strong enough to carry me.
As she ran through set, I saw him. He looked at my feet then back up to my eyes. I looked away.
Every time I looked at him, I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces.
I didn't want to feel that anymore. The part that I had just gained back, was gone again. But this time, it wasn't a part. It was a whole.
I was gone.
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Hope you enjoyed this chapter, and thank you for reading.
