cowan ☆ some things never change

Chapter 12

Rowan's pov

"Rowan, you need to come out! The taping starts in an hour!" Sabrina called from outside my door.

Sabrina was standing outside my trailer for 10 minutes now nagging me to go on in. 

I didn't want to face those people and plaster a smile on my face.  Even though I did it often, right now I wanted to be alone.

They didn't understand how hurt I was.  He hurt me.  I wanted him, but he didn't feel that way.

I ignored her calling me again.  I wanted to end my pain.  I had enough of suffering.

I couldn't take it anymore. I got up from my couch, and looked under my couch. I had been keeping pills there just in case. 

Just in case I couldn't hold on any longer.  And I couldn't.

I grabbed the bottle and started at it. Two at most it read. Guess I'm a rule breaker today.

I dumped the contents of the bottle into my hand and took a deep breath.

Corey's pov

I was laying on my couch after Rowan and my fight.  Peyton was banging on the door for 10 minutes trying to get me to come out.

I didn't want to.  I didn't want to see her face.  If I saw that tear stained face I would break down and never come back.

"Corey?" I heard a voice call out.

"Peyton I told you, I'm not com-"

"It's Sabrina." she said.

"Oh.  What's up?"

Rowan is in her trailer and she won't answer. I-I think she might be hurting herself" Sabrina cried from outside the door.

I immediately stood up and ran to Rowan's trailer. I didn't want her pulling another stunt like last time. I wasted no time and broke her door down, just like I had done before.

I saw the beautiful brunette passed out on her pink couch. And in her hands, an empty pill bottle.

I screamed. Sabrina came rushing in and broke down in tears.

"Call 911!" I yelled. I looked down at Rowan. Her hands were cold.

Don't give up on me Row.

I picked her up in my arms and brought her into the parking lot. I saw the whole cast outside staring at me.

I had tears in my eyes. I couldn't think straight. Everything was in slow motion.

I saw the ambulance and they took her from my arms.

Just like last time. It all came flashing back.

I caused her enough pain to make her jump out of a window. Had I done it again?

But this time I caused her enough pain for her to kill herself directly.

I couldn't believe it.  What have I done.

Rowan's pov

I was waking in a meadow.  There were daisies growing, and swaying in the wind along with the grass.

I was laying down in it.  All the sudden I saw a little light flicker in my eyes.  I stood up.

I was mesmerized by the sun.  Oh how it sparkled in the day.  It was so bright, and seemed to be getting brighter as I walked farther.

I kept walking further, and it got brighter.

Then all of the sudden I heard a voice calling my name.  I turned around.

I saw Corey.  Crying in the waiting room of a hospital.  Why was he crying?

He looked broken.

But not as broken as me.

I wanted to run to him.  I wanted to go back, hold him, and tell him I loved him.

But he didn't care.  He didn't want me.  And I guess I didn't want him.

I had to make a choice.  The sun was so pretty, but would I leave Corey alone?  Should I go into the light?

I made my choice.

Corey's pov

I sat in the waiting room of the hospital crying her name.  I couldn't picture her hurt.

I couldn't believe what I had done to her.  I never wanted to hurt her.

I loved her.  But she didn't care.  She didn't want me.  But I still wanted her.

I wanted nothing more than to hold her, like I used to.  It has been too long.

The rest of the cast was here, but I didn't pay attention to them.  They tried to cheer me up.  But I felt like I was slowly falling into a depression.

If I never saw that beautiful face smile again, I don't know what I'll do.  I can't live without her.

"Parents of Rowan Blanchard." the doctor called as he came out. 

I stood up "T-there in Asia, but um were here with h-her."

"Alright, follow me." We followed him  down the hall.  My legs were shaking with every step.  We went into a room and I saw the perfect girl laying in bed.

"We were able to save her.  Five more minutes and she would've died."

I took in shaky breaths.

"We're going to keep her here overnight.  You're welcome to come in this room now."

"Thank you." I sat down in the chair next to her bed.  Sabrina sat on the other side while Peyton, Amir, Ben and Danielle stood.

I looked at her.  She was pale.  She looked so fragile and cold.  I wanted to crawl into the bed with her and hold her until she got that shade of pink back in her cheeks, but I didn't.  I couldn't.

I spent the night there sleeping in the chair.  If Rowan woke up, I didn't see.  I was exhausted from fighting with her before.

I never wanted to say those things.  I felt terrible.  If only she knew.

Rowan's pov

I turned around from the sun and came running back to Corey.  I sprinted as fast as I could.  I could feel my legs going numb and my heart beating out of my chest.

I wanted nothing more than for him to hold me.

I opened my eyes and I was in a white room. A hospital room. Is that why Corey had been in a waiting room?

Then I remembered what I had done.

And I remembered what he had done. He didn't want me.

I saw him sitting beside me sleeping. Along with Sabrina and Peyton.

They have always been here. I smiled to myself. Man was I lucky.

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Hope you guys enjoyed my interesting chapter! I tried to use more detail.

Did you guys think Rowan was going to do that to herself?

Thanks for reading!

xoxo,
@riarklerucas