I can't do this, this is wrong, so wrong.
That keeps replaying in my head faster and faster as I walk over to my bestfriend Nash's house. My boyfriend, Nash's bestfriend, Jack Gilinsky is at vidcon right now, and he hasn't called me, or texted me in three weeks. He won't return my calls either. What did I do wrong? I don't know. But, I did something terrible last weekend, something I promised myself I would never do.
I slept with Nash.
Yes, I know it was a fucked up the to do, but Jack wasn't picking up his phone and it felt as if he just dropped off the face of the earth. I was sad and Nash was there, He was there to hold me and tell me it was going to be okay. I was vulnerable. Right now, I'm supposed to be joining Nash for movie, But I know it's going to end up somewhere else, it always has.
I knock on the door quietly, taking deep breaths as I wait. I bear footsteps and the door opens. Nash welcomes me with a huge bearhug. When he lets go I realize that he's shirtless.
Not, now hormones. Not now.
I step into his home and sit on the couch. Nash quietly sits next to me. We both know the tension is growing, I can tell by the look on his face.
"Nash." I blurt
"Hmm?" He looks at me
"We need to talk, about...about last weekend." I mumble
"I though you were never going to ask that." He says, looking relieved
"What we did that night, and-um that morning, was a mistake. I love Jack and I would have never done something like this." I say
"I know, that's what I've been meaning to tell you, I just couldn't shake the feeling of doing this to him. I mean, I was the one who set you two up. It's just that, I've always had this crush on you, even when I first saw you I became hooked, but I realized Jack was a better match and I-I just didn't want to ruin that. But, that night I was so pissed that Jack was ignoring you, I just wanted to show you how being treated right, felt like." He says, his hand on my thigh
Oohhh, boy.
"I'm really glad you agree. What we did was fun, and I'm not going to say that I'm not attracted to you, because I am. But, I really love Jack." I say, smiling
He smiles too and we both stand up. I wrap my arms around his neck as he wraps his arms around my waist. I squeeze him gently and pull away. But his grip on my waist doesn't loosen. I look up at him and his blue eyes meet mine. He leans I'm slowly, and I do too.
What the hell am I doing?! We just had a whole conversation about this???!
His tongue brushes against my lip and I give him entrance. We both pull away at the same time, letting go of each other.
"No, no, shit!" Nash says running his hand through his long hair "Damnit, I'm so sorry."
"Nash." I say quietly
He looks at me.
"What if, what if Jack is cheating?" I'd at quietly
"What? No, baby, don't say that. He isn't cheating." He says, walking up to me
"No, it's all, making sense now!" I exclaim, tears falling down my face "He was anxious to leave, Madison was invited to Vidcon, Jack even told me that they might have a room together! He promised, he promised me!"
"Don't think like that." Nash says
"And I'm just as bad as he is!" I say, walking up to Nash and sobbing into his chest
