Perfect Storms

chapter eight

"You said I'm just a sinking ship. But what that really means is you can't handle this. You couldn't win so you turn it around"
You Love Me ~Kelly Clarkson

When I went inside my Nashville apartment for the first time in months I was shocked to realize how long I had spent time away from this place. I asked Adam to come visit, come visit my family here and stay at this house I had called home longer than any other. But he would often refused saying he needed to stay where the action was in LA. I never argued. I simply forgot how much my Nashville home meant to me. It was a total comfort to be here now.
Tom was coming tomorrow, he took a later flight saying he had to cover some business first. I hoped he wasn't avoiding the arrangement. I told him over and over that if he wasn't comfortable spending the week at my house I could make other arrangements for him but he insisted saying he couldn't wait to spend a week with me in Nashville. I was excited I had already planned a few outings for us to keep us busy. I was nervous we were going to fast getting too comfortable too quickly but he always assured me that if any of it ever felt odd he wouldn't be doing it. I guess I'll just trust his judgement.
It had been a week since I last saw him. Since he asked me to be his girlfriend. I was nervous I do not think he knew what he was getting himself into. I tried talking to him about it. I warned him he would be forever marked by this and that when we broke up he would have all hell break lose on him. I then told him about my situation and how, after those picture of us were released and trust me they were, the media went ballistic saying all type of things like I cheated on Adam or how I was only using Tom for revenge. Tom knew he was a rebound relationship. But he dismissed it saying he had been eying me for years and did not mind. He was very even keel about the entire thing and when I finished my rambling he simply looked at me with a big smile and said "Are you trying to scare me away Miss Swift?" Everything about him was too good to be true. He seemed to know where I was hurting and how to make me feel better. He knew how to do relationships right. When I asked him about his past lovers he dismissed it saying he had been loosely seeing a co worker but nothing really happened. I felt guilty but later that week I looked it up thanks to google. I found he was right, no serious relations since... Well this one said since 2011 but I highly doubted that. In fact there was really next to nothing on his love life I could find. The man was extremely good at keeping it undercover. Unless of course he actually had not been dating for years but like I said I doubted that. I then found myself looking up more about him. About his charity work and the movies he was in. The Internet did not help much, there was practically nothing on here about the man other than his professional stuff. So I took to tumblr. Thankfully there was a huge marvel fandom that he had been dragged into. I made a mental note to watch those superhero movies they seemed to be a big deal.
Of course what I found were a lot of negative comments about me. Apparently I was not really liked by this fandom. I saw some funny memes that were probably much funnier had I known the avenger movie references they were making. Oh so he plays Loki and Loki's the bad guy lol I'm screwed I'm not finding anything on here I thought to myself. But after a lot of scrolling I found that even though he was the villain he had a lot of love from the fans and eventually I did find some nice things. Things about Tom and of course about us. When I flipped back to my usual feed I saw nothing but my fans practically freaking out over our beach photos. I could not lie the paps had taken some good ones.
But as I continued I also saw the news. Apparently Adam had deleted all our pictures together on his social media and was currently talking crap about me to my own fans. Well great. I quickly phoned Tree my publicist and asked her to kindly remove all photos of Adam and I off my Instagram and Twitter. She replied saying that that was a good move. I had not planned on moving those photos but now I had to. It made me a little sad. I had finally got to a point in my life where I felt I could confidently share my relationship publicly with my fans and everyone else. But that, like everything I did publicly, seemed to backfire too. I knew Adam had found a way around my contract. He wasn't exactly publicly talking about it but he was commenting back to fans posts. I knew he would find a way around it. He probably hated my guts for me making him sign that contract. I read some of his replies thanks to fans posting them everywhere. They were mean saying he was "finally free" and that "I controlled everything of his." He had a right to be mad that was for sure. I guess I should not be bitter towards that.  I knew exactly what he was doing. There was no doubt he was acting out after seeing me with Tom. He was bitter. He was mad I moved on. He was mad another man had happy run over to pick up the broken pieces he created. He couldn't win so he was making it seem I was the bad guy.
There was nothing more in this world I wanted to do than defend myself. I wanted so badly to type up my own messages saying what really happened. But I knew better. I would just have to be at peace with the fact that only Ton and I knew the true story and that is all that mattered.

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Hey I really suggest you all go listen to the songs I put at the beginning of each chapter before you read! They do a really good job explaining what's going on emotionally. Or at least I think they do. Do you like the lyrics at the beginning of each chapter?? PLEASE LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS THANKS!!