He Doesn't Even Know I'm Alive! | version 1

39:Pretending

so that's what I did. I pretend that I'm ok. When really I'm screaming inside.
Today Stormie invited me to a fun barbecue so I went! I got into a black sweater, black jeans & black converse. I pulled my hair into a ponytail and made my way there. When I got there Ratliff opened the door and gave me a big hug. "Well ok then!" I giggle.
"Are you okay?" He asks me.
"Yeah why?" I ask. Lies lies lies.
"Come in" he says. We went it the garden. Riker was fidgety and everyone was acting awkward.
"What's up guys?" I ask them.
"We know" Rydel says quietly.
"Know about what?" I ask.
"Your a Mom" she says. I froze.
I looked at Riker. He was red. I harshly grabbed his arm and pulled him inside.
We went in his room and I hit him.
"YOU IDIOT!" I hit him and hit him.
"YOU FUCKING IDIOT" I yell
"Lena I'm sorry!" He says holding my hands tight so I couldn't hit him.
"you promised NEVER to tell! I hate you!" I yell. I started to cry. He told!
"Lena" I push him back.
"Do not touch me!" I shout.
Rydel and Rocky came in and carried me out. They sat me on Rydels bed where I cried. I cried and cried.
"Hey there's nothing to be ashamed of!" Rydel assures me kindly.
"Lena it's good to have kids ya know?"
They said really kind things but it didn't stop me from crying. I didn't know what to say and I was upset.
"Lena what about we go eat?" Rydel suggests. I nodded and Rocky went and Rydel helped me clean up.
"We're gonna kill Riker ok? Whatever happens, we'll all support you!"
She hugged me and we went down to eat. We all sat down with me in between Rydel and Rocky and Ross opposite me. Riker was next to Rocky so we didn't have to look at each other.
I held my tears in and we ate the food. After we all cleared up. We all sat near the pool, our feet inside.
"Tell us about your daughter... if that's ok! If it's not then..." I cut Ross off
"Her names Lydia and she's three. She lived with my cousin for those years and then came here a while ago. She loves unicorns, food and the colour purple and you guys - especially you Ryland!" I say. His face lit up.
"Aww can we meet her?" He asks.
"Sure" i say. They all didn't seem to care I was pregnant at 15. They're all being so so sweet. And I like that.

We all talked more and then went to have some ice cream. After that we all went to go and play a game. Everyone went to go get their favourite games.
I waited and then I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Hey" I knew that voice.
"Go away" I say to Riker.
"Lena please I'm sorry..."
"Not only did you make me feel really worthless, YOU SNAKED ME! IVE BEEN LYING ABOUT BEING OK FOR AGES! YOUR NOT HELPING ME YOUR MAKING THIS WORSE!"
"I didn't know you felt that way..."
"Well now you do!" I left the room and went to the kitchen. I sat on a chair, hid my face and cried. Someone came in and rubbed my back kindly.
"Don't worry Lena. He made the worst biggest mistake ever to hurt you like that" Stormie says gently.
"Thanks" I say.
"Just relax Lena. We will always be here for you no matter what!"
"Thanks" Rydel came in and led me to the living room. Everyone was waiting. We all played Monopoly and then Wii.
After that they all - legit they all came - took me home. When I got in Nat was sitting with Lydia. I told her everything and cried my eyes out.
"I'm gonna kill him!" She says leaving the house. But for once I didn't care.
"Mommy I'm tired" she whines.
"Let's go to bed!" I say picking her up. I took her to her room and got her ready for bed. She fell asleep instantly. I looked at the photo of me and Riker. I smashed it on the floor and started crying again. I can't even ever trust him again.

•Natalie POV•
I banged on the door and Rocky opened the door. "Hey Babe!" He kissed me. "Hey baby. I need to kill Riker" I say. He frowned. "You know to?" He asks. I nodded. "He's upstairs"
I raced upstairs and flung the door open and he was sitting there on his phone. I picked it up and smashed it to the ground and it shattered.
"What the hell!?" He yells.
"WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO LENA!"
"I said I was sorry-"
"YOU RUINED HER LIFE AND HER!"
"I didn't mean it-" I slapped his cheek.
"You broke my best friend. NO ONE and I mean NO ONE hurts Lena! You always hurt her and she takes you back each time you screw up! She's so loving and your just straight up shit! She loves you and she still does even though you messed up." I spat.
"Natalie I suggest you go. Your just taking crap like always" he says.
I harshly pushed him back and he fell and hit his back against the wall.
"Take that back or we'll have issues"
"I'm scared" he says sarcastically.
I slapped him again. "Be scared"
I let go of him and left the room.

I got in and Lena was sobbing. I've seen Lena in really bad situations. And by far this was the very worst. but I knew there was yet more to come. And I didn't like this feeling.