The Christmas Mission

Chapter 24

"Our common sorrow, like a mighty wave,

Swept all my pride away, and trembling I forgave!"

--John Greenleaf Whittier, "Forgiveness"

Mary rummaged through the old closet of the inn as she retrieved her uniform for the day. She placed the old coat over her clothes, though the coat seemed to be in better shape than her actual clothes. She shut her eyes and whimpered a little, thinking of the clothes she had tossed aside at home. Her mother had found her crying by the doorstep and could only hold her and comfort her. She had offered to wash them and even get some of the items fixed, but Mary was too frightened. She'd dealt enough with humiliation.

Mary let out a sigh. It was hard to glance at Ruby and Chris now. She knew that they were curious as to why she had neglected to wear the clothes they'd gotten her when she'd embraced them so. Avoiding them wasn't too difficult, but she sure missed being honest with her friends.

Placing her things away, Mary retrieved the old vacuum and begin to vacuum up and down the halls. She held the coat up to her nose as dust flew around her. Ruby had already left for work, leaving Mary alone to perform her job.

She worked diligently, though the thought of the upcoming ball swarmed through her head. She'd been saving money, sure, but she couldn't stand if her dress was ruined too. She had grown to accept that she was a poor peasant and that's all she'd ever be.

"Lunch break, Mary!" Carrie called from down the hall.

"Okay!" Mary called. She finished folding one more set of sheets and retrieved the small lunch she'd brought with her.

"Hey, I'm gonna eat too. Want to sit with me?" Carrie asked.

Mary nodded and followed her to the small employee lounge. They took a seat at the table and began unpacking their lunches. Mary emptied out her lunch which consisted of a stale cookie from when Ruby had brought some over, a carrot, and two hard boiled eggs. She noticed Carrie watching her but only ignored her as she ate.

Carrie seemed to be eating a large sandwich stuffed with meat and veggies. Mary couldn't help but glance a few times. It was when she nibbling at the hard cookie that Carrie finally spoke up.

"Here. You can have the other half," she said, handing Mary part of her sandwich.

Mary's eyes widened. "Oh, no! I have a lunch. It's okay."

"I understand you're humble, but I'm not going to eat it, and I'd rather you have it than waste it. Eat it for me. As a favor," Carrie urged.

Mary reluctantly grabbed for the sandwich and bit into it. It was one of the best things she'd ever put in her mouth.

"I got to head back out there, but I'm glad to see you're enjoying it," Carrie called, laughing as she left. Mary had nearly wolfed down the whole thing. She nodded her head, her mouth full of food.

Mary let out a quiet belch as she finished her meal. She sighed and tossed her trash away. She had enjoyed the sandwich, but she was sick of being pitied. She probably could've saved up for that sandwich herself. She decided to offer to pay Carrie for it by the end of the day.

"Mary!" Carrie called.

Mary poked her head out of the door and found Carrie standing nearby.

"What do you need?" she asked.

"Your friend is here to see you."

Mary tilted her head. But Ruby's working, she thought. She then watched as Chris turned the corner and smiled weakly.

"But I've got work to do," Mary protested.

"You're still on lunch," Carrie assured her.

Mary nodded and awkwardly approached Chris.

"Um...hi. What are you doing here?" she questioned.

"I wanted to talk to you," Chris explained.

"About what?" she asked. Before Chris could reply, she pulled him into the lounge room.

"Cozy in here," he noted, detecting the smallness of the room.

Mary rolled her eyes. "And what do you want to talk about?"

"Ruby told me you've been acting weird and avoiding her..." He paused and glanced at her outfit. "And she was right! You're not wearing anything we got you! Was something wrong with it?"

Mary was trapped now. There was no escaping this conversation.

"N-no. I-I just decided not to wear it."

"But why? We want you to have it, Mary. You deserve some nice this you know for working so hard," Chris said.

"No, I don't. You don't understand. I'm dirt poor, and I will be all my life. That's how the world works!" she snapped. She quickly shut her mouth and held back tears.

"Is something else going on?" Chris asked.

Mary took a seat and took a deep breath. She let out a tiny whimper and then a sob.

"Oh, gosh, something is going on," Chris muttered, kneeling beside her.

"It's ruined," she murmured.

"Huh? What?" Chris asked.

Through tears she related to him the story of the neighborhood boys who had harassed her and ruined her gifts. Chris listened intently and with concern. Mary had never felt so close to him in the past. She wasn't sure why she was allowing herself to tell him this rather than Ruby.

"We can buy you more," Chris offered.

"And it's that too. I don't want anymore of that stuff if it means humiliation like that. I-I feel like I'm being pitied all the time," she admitted.

"You know it's not like that. And you shouldn't feel like you deserve this fate. Hey, look at me," he stated, noticing her turn away.

"I-I'm sorry. It's hard to think that way when it's all I've ever known," she spoke, sniffling.

"Well, you need to stop thinking that way because you are a lovely girl that deserves all the happiness in the world. Look, Ruby and I won't do anything extravagant anymore, but I still want to be of help, and I know Ruby does too. Will you let us help you?"

It took Mary a few moments of silence and a deep breath to finally nod.

"Yes...I will. Thank you for coming. I'm sorry I didn't tell Ruby earlier. I felt bad for getting the gifts ruined."

"Well, let's not worry about that anymore."

"Thank you, Chris," she said. She rose and hugged him, burying her face into his shoulder. He gave her a quick embrace too and then let go.

"Well, I need to get going. But you should talk to Ruby next time you see her," he advised.

"I will. Thank you for coming," she said. She watched as he walked away and then sat down in the chair more. For once, she finally felt free from the feelings of guilt that had stirred inside her so long.