"You think you want to die but in reality you want to be saved."
Hello, my darling.
I have much to tell. Much much to tell about Friday. I think it was the best night of summer I have had.
Friday morning I woke up and went straight to field hockey. It was a great scrimmage and my team won 2 out of 3 games. My coach also told me I will be playing swing, so I will play for both varsity and junior varsity. I was so excited when she told me that. While field hockey was going on though, the varsity football team was practicing. My boyfriend is on the football team and the whole entire time my friends and I kept trying to see him and get his attention. It was so funny. We kept on screaming his name and laughing. Soon enough my whole team joined in on the fun.
After field hockey my boyfriend came over. We practiced field hockey in my yard for a little while and then made our way into my garage and played music inside there and prank called people. Then we went for the most amazing walk through my neighborhood and came home to make a fire and set off Chinese lanterns into the air. We cuddled for the longest time after that. It was truly a great night.
Every good story though has some bad in it. My mother was so beyond rude to me. I had to listen to her saying "How did you even get that boy to like you? What did you do? Bribe him?" She honestly makes me feel like the most worthless piece of shit in the world. My boyfriend is a very amazing and talented young man but I mean, I am too? Aren't I? ...I don't know.
I am honestly questioning so much. Is my mother right? I mean he is truly amazing and I'm just, well, me. Nothing is special at all about me. I'm a no good piece of crap. I am one of the weakest human beings to ever walk this earth. I'm not strong, nor talented. My boyfriend deserves so much better. Why am I even wasting his time? I'd do anything for him and if it's better for him to be with someone greater than myself, I would let him. I just want his happiness, that is all. As long as he is happy, I shall be too.
I just need to sleep. I need to be alone.
ΔΙΑΒΑΖΕΙΣ
Letters From Society's Creation
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