It's unintentional, really,
what we've been through; where we were; where are are now
especially, where we are now, in the present
We should've gone through it; everything we did
Maybe made a pact to never fall in love because we know
that one of us is going to get hurt, some day, somewhere along the lines
and that still wouldn't be able to save me
I fell too deep, even though I told myself I never would;
shouldn't, couldn't say yes when you finally asked me the question
I've been waiting to hear
but the truth is, I couldn't and still can't trust you
with my heart, my life, my love
And even now, when we have descended down the spiral
so quickly, from something more than friends to something much less than friends
We don't talk anymore; at times I dread the fact
but other times I'm thankful it's over
because without you leaving me, I wouldn't have come to love myself
Not as much as I do now, and for that I thank you
Thank you for leaving me on the cold hard ground, drenched in my sweat and tears
whenever I wake up from a then-nightmare
I was afraid you'd leave me, so I kept on playing the game
dragging it longer than it should have, when I could've just ended it on that day
I didn't know you would be playing a game too, and that is why I lost
Because I couldn't control my game; funny how the game master lost control
so easily; so quickly, and maybe a little while after
I thought you'd pick me back up, but you didn't
or maybe you tried, but it didn't work
Tried to restart the game, it didn't work
It's broken, the controller, the CD, the TV
all because I played on it for too long
And now I know, some things are meant to stay broken
Now I know, trying to ignoring you, deleting you off of everything
is just so immature; it's not the right way to go
I'm not doing it on purpose at all; it's just better this way
To be honest, yes I can't look at you in the eyes, too deep and dark
Too dangerous for me; I knew that right from the start
But I loved it; the rush, the touch
But now I know, I shouldn't have dived head straight
And where are we now, swimming away from the center we started at
Never looking behind, afraid of drowning again
And I guess, it's best if we never swim back out in the same pool
You understand as well as I do, that it will never be the same because of the choices we made
We're too intersecting lines, meeting once then diverging paths, never to meet again
And it's safe to say we're happier this way
even though I must admit, I still look for you, I see you first in a crowd of people
face uneraseable; and I can't help but look at your name when you're online
even though I know I shouldn't;
I'm not going to try anything
because it takes more energy than I have
I'll be strong enough soon, don't wait up
because I won't be fighting for you, I'm fighting for myself
And that makes all the difference
And now I know, what I wanted was for you to want me
Because I don't want you anymore
