Hanging on, Till Death do us part...

Chapter 19

Kate's eyes are set on mine as I lay her down on my bed for the second time tonight. I have been waiting for this moment for as long as I can remember. The white sheets, despite us lying on them only a few moments ago, are cool against our skin. The fabric smells fresh as I weight pushes the air through the mattress.

I love this. I love that Kate is back in my life. After months of being away from her, months of not feeling her skin, not smelling her hair as she hugs me, not tasting her full, sweet lips, this feels like absolute heaven.

I am so glad that Kate told me about her affair. Even though I knew, I needed to hear her say it, I needed to hear her admission. I meant what I said, at first I didn't think I could ever forgive her. My heart had shattered into a million pieces when I found out about her affair, I was broken, I was angry, I was afraid. I didn't want to leave her, but I could not find the strength to forgive her, until about a month ago.

It was my weekend with the girls, and when I dropped them off on Sunday afternoon, like I had done before, I found the security locked but the door open. This was the norm;

"Kate? We are back." I had Maddy on my hip and Zoe by my side.

"Where is she daddy?" Zoes big eyes stare up at me.

"I'm not sure baby, lets get my keys and then we can go have a look."

I scratched the keys out my car and unlocked the door.

"Zoe-bear, stay behind daddy ok?" I slowly walked into my old house, not sure of what I would find.

I heard the noises of the television softly drifting from the bedroom;

"Zoe, go get you and your sister a biscuit ok, Ill be right back."

I placed Madison down on the kitchen floor and Zoe raided the sweet cupboard. Slowly, quietly, I walked towards the bedroom.

"Kate?" No answer.

I stood in the doorway of the bedroom that Kate and I shared for years, and lying peacefully on the bed, was Kate fast asleep.

She was wearing black running shorts and a tight strappy pink top. The top was pushed up, exposing her hip and part of her tummy. Her hair hung slightly over her face and her lips were parted. Her chest, rose and fell with each deep, calming breath she took.

"Kate?" I whispered softly to her.

She still lied, fast asleep.

I walked towards the bed, and gently rubbed the hair from her forehead.

"Kate?" I whispered again, and this time she stirred slightly, her hand that was holding onto something opened.

It was her wedding ring.

I looked down at the small body that lied curled up on the large king size bed. I wanted to, with every fibre of my being, lie down next to her and wrap my arms around her. It was right then that I realised that I had forgiven her, that I could not continue pretending that I did not want her back. It was then that I realised that nothing she could ever do, would be able to sway my love from her.

Kate is lying on my bed, the t-shirt that she is wearing has crept up and exposes her tanned stomach; the fine sketches of the stretch marks that the girls left on her body clearly visible. I lie down, placing my hands on both sides of her head and shadow her body with mine.

"I love you Mrs Stanton." I place a kiss on her forehead.

"I always have..." I place a kiss on her nose.

"I always will..." I place a kiss on her lips.

Her smile shoots through me and like an arrow from cupid, hits me in the heart. God how I missed making her smile.

"I love you Mr Stanton." She rubs her small hands over the stubble of my beard and loops her fingers around the necklace which now daggles near her lips.

With her admission, with her declaration, with the words that I have waited to hear for so long; I make love to my Kate, to my wife, to the women that I killed for. To the women that I will kill for again in a heartbeat, and Rob is next on my list.