Chapter 37

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Jaida:

I woke up the next morning with my arms wrapped around Bella and with a smile on my face. It was a well deserved night's sleep, that I thought I wouldn't have been able to have for an extremely long time. Sliding off the bed, pulling Bella to the middle, I walked out to the kitchen where Maggie was busy making breakfast.

"Mags you're a miracle worker," I told her when I walked into the kitchen and took a seat.

She turned in surprise, "Oh Jai! You're awake! What do you mean?"

I smiled, "Thanks to you, I got the best night sleep."

She smiled in response, "I'm glad I can help, although I don't think I did much," she said thoughtfully.

I shook my head, "I called my mother last night and it didn't go well," I said sadly. She stopped what she was doing and turned to face me, with a raised eyebrow.

"Whatever that lady told you Jaida, it isn't true, so get that look off your face. If she's convinced you of something bad then she isn't be fit to be called your mother. In times like this, she is suppose to support you and comfort you, not belittle you and make you think this is your fault."

I nodded slowly, I knew she was right because that's what I desired, the comfort of a mother but I found it elsewhere in someone who truly cared for me.

"Good, now that we've come to an understanding, what are you doing today?" She asked, placing a plate of eggs in front of me and a cup of coffee before taking a seat nearby.

"Well I wanted to go into work today, I haven't seen Liza since that day but I have a feeling you'll keep me here and make me late."

Maggie smirked, "It's too soon for you to go off to work sweetie and you know I'm right. One good night sleep doesn't mean you're 'fixed.' Will you be able to handle being around complete strangers?"

I bent my head, idly playing with the food on my plate before shaking it, just because I didn't freak out with Bella and Maggie doesn't mean that everything was a-ok with everyone else. I could picture it already, the massive panic attack I would be having the middle of Liza's place.

"Exactly, you know I'm right but I'll take you to her's for a visit if that's what you want. I haven't seen my niece in quite some time."

I smiled at the thought of spending the day with Maggie, it was something that rarely occurred and I was glad whenever they did manage to happen.

"Jai-" I glanced up at Maggie to see a serious expression on her face.

"I don't want to tell it Maggie, not now," I whispered, feeling the familiar sting in my eyes as the tears swelled up.

She reached out to grab my hand that I didn't even realize was trembling and I stiffened up again, "I won't push you Jai, I just think you need to tell someone the whole story. Have you considered getting help?"

I shook my head, "I don't want to go. If I can't talk to the people I trust without freaking out, how am I suppose to deal with a complete stranger?"

"They know how to help you, much more than we do. We just want you to be better."

I sighed, "I know but I don't think I can talk to anyone yet, I'd rather talk to someone I trust than a complete stranger."

"Just consider getting the help, please? Think about Bella, that should be enough incentive to get help. I know you so desperately want to get back to your normal lifestyle so do what's right."

I glanced to the hallway that lead to the guest room where Bella was still sleeping maybe getting some help won't be that bad. The last thing I'd want is to panic attack and lash out on her by accident. "I'll do it, in a heartbeat for her. Everyone knows that," I whispered mostly to myself.

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