Silent Screams

Poem 52

I was confused by the texts
That he sent me late at night
"Please" he would plead
And beg for my help
I complied, I was kind
I kept my dignity in line
I kept my heart guarded still
And yet
The next day, he ignored
All that was said
The compliments laid out
And the energy that existed
He would go days
With unengaged replies
And then he needed me again
He knew I would comply
And our texts were secret for school
It would be awkward to bring up
And yet
The way he ignored me
Hurt in a way I could not explain
I wanted to know him
I wanted to be his friend
There was no romance I desired
I did not desire romance from him
And yet
The way I presented myself
Might seem as though I do
Seem like I want him
In a way that I never have
And hopefully never will
And yet
He was conceited
He was less kind in person
There were promised hugs
That were left in lies
I didn't want romance
Not from him, oh god no
I just wanted to be appreciated
To have him enjoy my company
And yet
I figured he never will
Unless we are alone
Unless we are texting
Unless he needs me
And yet
I forget each time