colours [book #2] [c.hood]

13.

it was now or never, it was either the gut wrenching truth or a blatant lie, she was going to finally break up with him, it took her four hours, thirty six minutes and forty two seconds to prepare herself for what she was about to endure tonight. maybe she'll get yelled at, maybe she'll get insulted but she was ready for that, she was ready to be crushed as she crushes nathan's fragile little heart.

they started out with a family dinner, georgia, andrew, luke and baby joey along their sides, luke burning holes into the side of her head, every time luke had opened his mouth, indie's heart rate picked up, not knowing when the blonde could suddenly spill her dirty little secret. it wasn't the references or the little threats that luke had sent her way but it was her own thoughts clouding her mind and reminding her all the stupid stuff she had brought nathan into and all the stupid stuff nathan is going to be brought through again.

it was finally the time.

x x x 

"babe," indie had her hands balled into fists, sweat coated her palms. nathan came into the room, his ever lovely smile going to be turned into a frown so very soon. "we need to talk." nathan only nodded, sitting down on the edge of her bed, hearing her silent deep breaths.

"is everything alright?" he asked, placing a hand on her knee, the action made her heart pump even harder, the pale look on her face caused him to worry a little bit. "babe, you're looking a little pale. are you sick?"

indie shook her head, her mind slowly closing, feeling like she was going to pass out at anytime. "i-i don't know how to say this, you're the greatest person i've ever met and i want to keep this short because you mean the whole entire world to me and i--"

"i don't know whether you're proposing or breaking up with me. mind cutting it short?"

indie took a deep breath, ready to feel whatever wrath was coming her way. "i don't think we should do this anymore, the whole relationship thing, you were the best thing to ever happen to me, you made me super happy in the time we had together but i just feel so lost and i don't know what to do and i-i haven't exactly been faithful to you."

the moment nathan lifted his head up from looking at his hands, indie wanted to cry and punch herself in the face. "what do you mean?"

another breath left her lips as she tried to recollect herself, she didn't know why she felt like crying, it wasn't like nathan was cheating on her, every single word that had left her lips was like another reminder to what she did wrong, she felt disgusted with herself. "you can honestly hate me all you want after this because i deserve to be hated on but i cheated on you, i cheated on you because i'm confused, i'm stupid and i can't control myself. i cheated on you because all this time i was still not over the same boy who broke my heart three years ago. i cheated on you but you don't deserve that, i feel so terrible and i know whatever i did can't change anything. i am so sorry but i honestly do not expect that you forgive me because i don't forgive myself."

the little sniffles from the boy next to her broke her heart, the lifts of his palms to his eyes broke her heart, the sight in front of her broke her heart, her eyes were red as well, her own little sniffles taking over. "i am so sorry, nathan, i am so so sorry. if i could take everything back, i would--"

"well that took you a while." nathan's calm and serene voice caught indie off guard, a little small sad chuckle falling out of his lips. "don't you think i've realised that by now?"

"what?"

"from the first moment i saw you with him when i first arrived here, i could tell you were happier with him in one day than you ever were with me in two years," nathan began, his head lifting a little as they made eye contact. "or that time at karen's baby shower when you guys sat next to each other, you both look like you were in love. but what hurts the most is that you look at him the way i look at you, i've been waiting two years for you to look at me the way you do to him but i guess it's all over now."

"nathan--"

nathan silenced her by shaking his head and standing up, "just promise me something yeah?" indie tilted her head up, a weak nod was given as a response. the last thing she ever expected was a forehead kiss by the man whose heart she just shattered. "it should be about happiness, always."

indie watched nathan turn around and leave her room, something in her just had to call him back before he would've left completely. "nathan, wait." nathan slowly turns around, giving her a questioning look. "can you promise me something?"

he nodded as she gives him a small smile. "will you promise me that when you do find someone who looks at you the way i do at calum, you'll call me?"

indie didn't really expect a response, she actually expected a door slam but nathan was a loving soul, the boy nodded, sending her one last smile, "i'll be gone in the morning." the door slammed shut and it felt like a thousand bricks have been lifted off her shoulders.

x x x 

"i did it, i broke up with him." indie spoke through her phone, she decided to call calum right away, her voice strained from the sobbing she had done earlier to punish herself.

"what?"

indie repeated herself. "i broke up with him cal, i shattered his fucking heart. i broke it. you should've seen his face, i feel like such a terrible person, oh god."

silence, calum responded with silence, the sound of breathing scaring her even through a receiver, "i--you shouldn't have done that."

her heart felt like it could stop. "what do you mean?"

"i--i don't think i can do it, indiana, ashley--i can't break up with her."

was calum being serious? she broke someone's heart for him, she was someone's light and sunshine but she made herself rain on his parade. indie wanted nothing more but to jump through the cell phone and punch him in the face. "what do you mean you can't break up with her?!"

"i can't!" calum's voice was stern but held back. "you wouldn't understand!"

"then make me understand, calum," indie said through gritted teeth. "tell me why you can't break up with your girlfriend when i f.ucking shattered my boyfriend's heart."

calum groaned. "i can't tell you!"

"you made me do this, calum! don't you f.ucking pull that card on me! this is not funny, what the fuck--"

"ashley's pregnant! she's fucking pregnant alright?!"

-

so luke and iggy azalea anyone? his lane is so fucking messed up i feel so bad for luke girls (i am one tho) but y'know i gotta stay chill for the mad ones

so plot twist on this story am i right

song of the chapter ; taken // one direction

stay great, don't constipate. x