The minute Lillie spat those words—“you filthy grunt”—it felt like my heart cracked open. I couldn’t even speak. I couldn’t defend myself. My throat locked up, and all I could do was run.
I heard them calling something behind me—maybe Paulo’s voice, maybe even Blue—but it didn’t matter. I was gone. The tears hit full force the second I turned the corner, past the crumbling ruins, past Red’s sharp intake of breath. He didn’t say anything. Of course he didn’t.
He just did his usual thing: that quiet, unreadable expression... that tiny flinch that said everything and nothing at all.
And it hurt worse than Lillie’s words.
Because it meant he believed them. Didn’t it?
I didn’t stop running until I couldn’t anymore. My chest burned, my legs shook, and I was choking on sobs I couldn’t hold in anymore. When I looked up, I realized where I had ended up.
Professor Bellis’s lab.
I hadn’t even realized I was heading this way.
The door creaked as I opened it, and the warm light from inside spilled over me. I stepped in, trying to calm the hiccuping sobs racking my body, my face a mess. Bellis looked up from her notes, startled, and immediately stood from her desk.
“Mia?” she asked softly, concern washing over her features as she walked toward me. “Sweetheart, what happened?”
I tried to speak, but my voice cracked. I shook my head and lowered it, the guilt and shame too heavy to face her properly.
She didn’t press.
Instead, she gently guided me to the couch in the corner, brushing hair out of my face and wrapping me in a warm throw blanket. She crouched in front of me, her eyes kind, gentle, and not judging. Not like the others.
“Do you want to tell me what happened, or should we just sit for a while?”
I buried my face in the blanket.
“Sitting… please.”
And so she sat beside me, no questions, no pressure, just her quiet presence anchoring me to something that wasn’t falling apart.
For once, I didn’t feel like a traitor. I just felt… like Mia.
And I really, really needed that.
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Professor Bellis had just stepped into the other room to grab some herbal tea, leaving me curled up on her lab’s old corduroy couch, my knees tucked to my chest and the blanket still clutched around me like armor. The soft hum of the lab’s machines did nothing to soothe the storm swirling in my head.
I kept hearing it.
"You filthy grunt." "Just showing what kind of person you are."
And the worst of all? Red’s silence.
That unreadable, ice-still look. Like I’d betrayed them. Like I’d betrayed him.
My fingers twisted tighter around the blanket.
Then I heard it—the familiar, careful creak of the lab door being pushed open. Light footsteps. Precise. Intentional.
I didn’t even look up.
“What do you want?” I muttered coldly, keeping my eyes locked on the floor.
No answer.
Of course.
I clenched my teeth. “Let me guess. You’re here to do your whole ‘…’ act again, stare at me all judgmental, say nothing, and then walk away like I’m not even your sister, right?”
Still no answer. Just the sound of the door gently shutting behind him, and then those quiet footsteps again, moving closer.
“Don’t.” My voice cracked. “Don’t you dare get close to me if you’re not gonna say anything.”
And then—
“I didn’t know.”
I blinked.
My eyes finally lifted, and there he was—Red. Hat still shadowing his eyes, jaw tight, hands at his sides. But he wasn’t frozen or unreadable this time. His brows were furrowed, his mouth parted slightly, and there was a tension in his shoulders I hadn’t seen since we were kids.
“I didn’t know it was you,” he said, voice rough, low. “I didn’t look close enough.”
I scoffed, wiping at my face harshly. “That makes it better?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Then what are you saying?” My voice trembled. “That I’m stupid for going undercover? That I embarrassed you?”
Red stepped forward, slowly. “I’m saying I messed up.”
That… stopped me cold.
I stared at him.
He took a breath and sat down on the floor in front of me—not next to me, in front of me, his arms on his knees. “You’ve been doing this whole thing alone. Hiding how scared you are. Hiding what it does to you.”
I looked away, eyes blurring again. “I had to. You think anyone would’ve let me do it otherwise?”
“Yeah,” he said quietly. “I wouldn’t have.”
That one stung.
“But that’s not because I didn’t think you were strong,” he added quickly, urgently now. “It’s because I do. I know what this mission stuff does to you, and I hate that I didn’t notice how hard you were breaking to pull it off.”
Silence stretched between us again. My throat tightened.
He looked up at me, eyes finally visible beneath the shadow of his cap.
“Blue said what he said because he didn’t know. But I should’ve known. You’re my little sister.”
I swallowed hard.
“And when I saw you run,” his voice cracked, barely audible, “I knew I messed up worse than ever before.”
I wiped my cheeks with the sleeve of the blanket. “You didn’t even call after me.”
“I froze.” He clenched his fists. “I saw you crying and just… froze. And I hated myself the second you were gone.”
I bit my lip, hard. “Why are you saying this now?”
Red looked down, then back at me with something raw in his expression. “Because I don't want you thinking I hate you. Or that I ever could. I’m sorry, Mia.”
A moment passed.
Then another.
And then, barely above a whisper, I said, “I thought… I thought I made you ashamed.”
He closed the distance between us, gently took my hand, and pressed it to his chest.
“I’m not ashamed of you,” he whispered. “I’m proud of you. Even when I’m too quiet to say it. Even when I’m too stupid to show it.”
And just like that, the dam broke again.
But this time, I didn’t cry because I was hurt.
This time, I cried because—for once—I didn’t feel so alone.
