A Cyborg in Time

The Preposterous Pulverizing of the Pestering Poopacabra!

Melvinborg stepped out of the office.

He had just set his class a task to train an animal for extra credit, and it was all going well.

Of course, Krupp is probably too old to check on those kids, but it's never a dull moment with them... that, or he's too busy being our guinea pig.

"Now for you," He turned to George and Harold. The two boys were covered in an off-color dirt and were wet from head to toe. He'd already judged everyone, even Hazel, his sister strangely wearing a gas mask.

But there were two rats... and they were made of clay, for some reason.

"I see what's going on!" Melvinborg smirked. "It's the old replace one real rat with two clay rats hustle!" He leaned forward to talk better with the two, but it was at that point that his senses began burning.

"Ew, gross!" He cried and recoiled away from them. "Why do you two smell like crap?!"

George backed up somewhat, aware of her positioning, and Harold winced a bit at the question. "Technically, it is."

"What do you-" And Melvinborg recoiled even more. "Eugh, what is that awful smell?!"

Then a rat monster wearing a diaper let out a growl as it leapt out of the floor. It was so bad that Melvinborg swore he could almost see the stench.

He and his past self ran into the football field and snapped their fingers wildly.

And Captain Underpants came out.

"Captain Underpants, the school smells like cabbage!" Melvinborg screamed.

"Close down the school!" Melvin said.

"Okie-dokie!" Captain Underpants said.

Then the Melvins went into their office, put on their gas masks and waited for the end.

When Melvinborg took off his gasmask, the school was still open.

And the rat monster was gone.

What?

"It's obvious that Melvin's Advancimal is the winner." Melvinborg gave Melvin's chimp a blue ribbon.

He saw George and Harold, both with shit eating grins. The stench had all but vanished from them, thankfully.

Hazel wasn't wearing the gasmask anymore.

They said nothing, only stared at each other in surprise, and it almost felt like they were both waiting for the other to make the first move.

The shocking thing was the only thing Melvinborg could do was wait for his sister to do or say something first.

To his immense relief, though, the only thing Hazel did was scowl, get up, open the door, walk through it, slam it in frustration, and stalk off in the opposite direction.

Melvin's chimp gave Melvinborg a basket, and he sighed. "I'm sorry," she said as he took a handful of strawberries. "You know... I sometimes forget Hazel is in this class."

Harold drew in a sharp breath. "Not gonna lie, I do too."

George nodded. "She's near constantly rebooting her personality. She acts all brash and confrontational one minute, then acts all polite and sweet the next. It's like she has BPD or something. Harold and I gave up attempting to figure out her angle a while ago."

Melvinborg sat in his office, and gathered his thoughts.

"I didn't try to be evil today. Regardless, I'll be a good big brother to the world's worst little sister alive. And try to solve her mysteries... What's up with her shifting personalities? But I'll prank her soon... Not only to get her off my back, but to take her down a peg. For her, schoolwork is everything. But... I guess for us together... siblinghood isn't."