𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗮𝘀𝗸, 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 || 𝗽𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲

39. Floral dress

─── ∙ ~εïз~ ∙ ───

I'm sitting on the couch with my legs close together. My hands are resting on my knees. My dad is sitting on the other end of the couch. He's giving me the silent treatment. He hasn't talked to me ever since he picked me up from the hospital.

Ms Sim took me to a check up to make sure I didn't have any ear damages due to me being close to the explosion. The only thing they concluded is that I was in a state of shock. They gave me some medicine incase I start getting panic attacks through out the day.

"Dad.." I break the silence. "..I know you're angry with me"

"I'm glad you're aware of that" he twists his arms together. "What were you doing with Logan today?"

"After you told me he's investigating you, I called him. I was friends with his late sister, I knew he wouldn't lie to me"

"And? What did he say?"

"He said to meet me at Ms Sim her company. He wanted to explain everything and then.."

My dad puts his head in his hands. "I can't believe you almost lost your life for me.."

"Dad, it's not your fault. I acted reckless. I wanted to help you"

"That doesn't take the guilt away" he glances at me. "From now on, I don't want you anywhere near this case. I'll handle everything and make sure the police doesn't ask you for a statement"

"But dad-"

"Focus on the csat. And I heard the SNU vocal exam is next week? Did you prepare?"

"Yeah, Seokkyeong and I are supposed to meet up later to go through everything"

"Good..good" dad gets up. "Mr Joo got into an accident today"

I look up. "What?"

"Apparently Ha Yuncheol stabbed him in the yard" he scoffs. "I knew they would eventually go crazy in there"

"Are you going there now?" I ask.

"Are you okay with that?"

I nod. "I'll tell Seokkyeong we can practice here then"

My dad walks over to me and kisses me on my forehead. "Don't forget to take your medicine every 3 hours"

─── ∙ ~εïз~ ∙ ───

I'm walking through the hallways of school. I'm still a little on edge. The music in my ears is helping me calm my nerves. Every little sound I hear in real life sounds like that explosion or Ms Sim her cry.

I sit down behind my desk and start to think. Who was that man I saw yesterday. I can barely remember his face. It's a fog. But there was something about him that made me reach to a name. I just can't remember the name.

"Hey Dami" Seokkyeong sits down in front of me and tosses a notebook on my table. "I accidentally took your notebook home with me yesterday" she then looks at me. "You look so pale. Are you sick?"

I plug my earphones out. "No, I just didn't sleep well"

I grab the medicine I got prescribed out of my bag and take them without anyone seeing. Seokkyeong looks at me with frowning eyebrows.

"What's that?"

"It's a dietary supply. I haven't been eating well" I lie.

I wish I could tell her everything. It felt like the right moment. I can't lie to her anymore. Her dad is in jail and her birth mom is dead meanwhile her best friend is living a secret life she doesn't know about. 

"Mom said your mom and sister went back to Italy" Seokkyeong leans over to me. "Just stay at our house. My mom cooks us amazing dinner every night. Your dad probably forgets to feed you"

"It's okay. I just haven't been feeling hungry lately"

"But you need to have energy" she takes a little cake out of her bag. "My mom packed it for me. You can have it"

"I'm fine. I'm not hungry"

"Just eat it, you need to-"

"I told you that I'm fine!" I yell out. "Gosh Seokkyeong can you ever back off?"

I get up, grab my back and leave the classroom. I weep a silent tear as I walk down the stairs. I cried furious. Why is she always trying to fix me like I'm broken? Why is she always talking to me like I'm a child? Why is she always worried about me? Why is she..being such a good friend to me when I don't even deserve it. 

"Are you okay?"

My body jolts when hearing the voice. I turn around and see that it's Seokhoon. 

"What?" I ask.

"I asked you if you're okay"

 "No, I feel horrible"

"Is something going on?" he grabs my hand. "Is it because of what happened yesterday? With Logan?"

"What?" I try to remember. "Oh, yeah that"

"I know it's hard. Mom told me that..."

His voice fades. His lips are moving, but there is no sound coming out. Looking into his eyes makes me dizzy.

"I need to go" I say out of breathe.

My entire body is sweating. It's driving me crazy. I start hearing a cry, a loud crying. Should I cry too? But nothing is sad. Maybe if I pretend to cry, the crying will stop. I force tears down my cheeks. But the crying doesn't stop. 

I turn my body 360 degrees. There's no one around me. Where is the cry coming from? It's so close to me as if there's a ghost crying into my ear. I place my hands on my hand and try to hit it out of me. It only gets worse.

I stop hitting myself and fall down on the ground. The crying is gone. It's finally gone. I hear laughter now. Is there something funny? Is it me? The laughing sounds like me, but I don't have a reason to laugh. Maybe I'm laughing because of myself and how stupid I look.

My eyes shift towards my hands. They're covered in red liquid. What is this? It's so thick and dark. Around me I see police officers running around. Are they looking for someone? Is it me? Did I hurt someone? 

"Dami"

My head turns around. A woman is standing behind me. She's so tall. She has beautiful long curly hair and is wearing a pink floral dress. She reaches her hands to me and lifts me off the ground. I seem so small compared to her.

"Dad will be home soon. Should we get you dressed so you can surprise him with the gift we got him?"

Her voice is so soft. I've never heard anyone talk to me like that. She talks to me with so much love and care. I want to hug her. She feels like someone I can trust. 

My body suddenly drops to the ground again. I'm back on the same spot as before. My hands are dripping in red. I look for the woman, but I can't find her. Everything around me is dark. It brought a pang to my heart. I can hear screaming coming from one side of the room and whispering from the other.

I wonder if the woman in the floral dress is okay. 

─── ∙ ~εïз~ ∙ ───