Goodbye - Jimin [18+]

24

He had gotten used to being alone. Attending those appointments all by himself, only to receive news he knew would have him in a slump the rest of the day as he finished getting dressed to go to that same appointment. Having thrown on no more than a hoodie and sweats, in which he let the thickness of his black hair fall all too heavy over his eyes.

And like usual, the man felt it. That worry. Worry he'd never get used to enduring so heavily as he walked into that doctors office on those feet all too reluctant.

"Park Jimin." It was always the same. The same quick check in before he'd hear his name get called. Yet this time the doctor was already in the room. Making the man's expression just barely falter the second he met his eyes.

"Take a seat for me, Jimin." He didn't know what was wrong. Didn't know if it was he himself  who had done something as Jimin did just as told. Taking that seat, only to ponder at the thought of just what was about to happen.

"You've been going in and out of treatment how long now, Jimin—"

"A-A few years." He didn't mean to sound nervous. Watching as the doctor sighed that sigh so quiet, only to pull off the glasses he attired before tucking them into his shirt.

"Your cancer hasn't grown for the past 5 months, Mr.Park. In fact it's almost entirely gone." All he could do was look at the man. His expression ever so blank and body just as tense as it'd be each time he'd go to that single doctors office. Leading to him staying solely quiet, in which the doctor spoke yet again.

"This is very good news, Jimin. Even myself never thought you'd recover the way you have." The doctor shook his head. Knowing that the man had almost passed away. Did pass away. Yet there he was sitting there speaking to him. . . and all alone.

"We'll run a final round of testing but after your next treatment, you're done until further notice." The doctor could see just how blank his expression fell. Having never believed he'd encounter this moment. Yet the man wasn't sitting with the one woman he would've given anything to have be there right now to witness this. Because he knew. Knew how badly she had once craved to hear these words.

"What are you feeling, Jimin?" He didn't know. Didn't know whether to be relived. Didn't know whether to be happy. All he did know was that he felt absolutely nothing. Nothing at all.

"I-I don't know." He watched as the doctor got to his feet. Resting that hand so heavy on his shoulder as he did so, only to look down at the one man who had cut himself off from the world in ways that had him feeling. Feeling nothing.

"You should be proud of yourself, Jimin. Go and reward yourself with a drink or something, huh?" The doctor patted his shoulder. Making Jimin do no more than nod before listening to that deep I'll see you at your next appointment, in which he only gave him a soft nod yet again. All while the doctor led him out of that room. Sparing on last look towards the boy, only to go their separate ways.

And all Jimin could do was enter that car. The engine off and seatbelt not on. Staring at nothing more than that steering wheel as he felt his vision fall blurred with tears he didn't try to produce. Because all he could feel was that emptiness. Emptiness that came with cutting off the one girl he had wanted to so badly share this moment one day with.

Yet that day was here. And the woman was nowhere to be found. Making him wish he would've reached out. That he wouldn't have never let her know that he had been resuscitated. That he was sitting there in that vehicle with the woman by his side as the two endure upon those smiles and kisses so genuine. Able to picture her expression in his mind. Holding a smile so big and tears she wouldn't have cared to let fall. Yet again, all he could do was picture it. Picture it the whole way home where he walked into that apartment and to the one couple he walked right past on the couch, before going to his room in complete silence. Having felt them watch him ever so innocently, all until that bedroom door could fall shut behind him.