Sweet and Salty ~ Carl Grimes

Burn, Feed, Wash - 062

The last thing any survivor of the breakout wants is to turn into a walker, because nobody knows what really happens. Nobody knows if you're conscious, if you can taste the cockroaches and the birds and the bunnies that you eat. Nobody knows if you're in pain, or just a mindless robot forced to walk the Earth until someone puts you out of your misery. For the first time, Brooks found herself wishing that the walkers were conscious, just so those four men got the punishment they deserved. 

She buried Hershel behind the bar, and let him keep Maggie's letter. She didn't need it, and she was sure that Hershel would want to keep that reminder that his little girls are alive. Brooks even found a Bible upstairs in the bar, and she buried him with that as well. Not only that, but she said a prayer. She didn't know any official death prayers to recite for him, but she did her best for the man that became her Grandpa Hershel. 

"Dear, God." Brooks started, already cringing at the words, thinking she was saying the wrong thing. She didn't want to mess up, because Hershel already deserved better than this. "My Grandpa Hershel was a good man. He believed in you, even when he had every reason not too. You tested 'im with the deaths of two wives, a stepson, a best friend; you made 'im an alcoholic... And then, in his final days, you separated 'im from 'is girls. You got 'im stuck with me, and I'm sure that I'm the last person he wanted to be 'round for 'is judgment day." Brooks said, staring at the freshly turned over dirt, before looking up to the cloudless sky. "Listen, man, I don't know much about religion. But, I know that if you're up there on your little cloud, eatin' popcorn and watchin' us durin' our extinction event... Then, you gotta be lettin' the good ones in. And, my Grandpa Hershel? He wasn't just a good one, he was the best one. So, you let 'im in, and you let 'im see his family. You keep 'im company until one day, very far in the future, he can see Beth and Maggie again... Alrigh', now... Amen."

It was messy, but she made her point.

After her speech, she found herself falling to the ground beside the turned over dirt. She just sat there, and sat with him. Her fists pulled at the grass, and her bottom lip snaked between her teeth. Bowing her head, Brooks watched as her own eye droplets hit the green grass beneath her. Shaky sob after shaky sob snaked its way past her lips. Brooks knew she'd have to leave soon, leave for Terminus, for her family... But her legs felt like lead. How do you get up and walk away from a grave that you know you'll never return too? She'd done it five times that week, but Hershel had been there for her through all of it. His determination for his daughters back fuelled her desire to see her family... But, she couldn't move. She didn't want to leave him.

The small flutter of wings snapped her out of her trans of staring at the dirt, and she peered up. There it was, that goddamn robin, sitting on the marker she'd made for his grave. It stared at her, taunting her, like it knew. Brooks stared at it back, remembering how it flew away the night before. Perhaps this event was too dark for even the robin to watch, but now it was back.

"You did your best." A soft voice said, Brooks peered up, and saw Marliya sitting opposite her, the other side of Hershel's grave. "Don't carry this with you." The hallucination spoke. She hadn't eaten in a few days, Brooks was still smart enough to know that she wasn't going crazy - she just needed fuel. 

Shaking her head, Brooks' chin trembled and her eyes weighed her down with tears once more. "I thought I'd never hear your voice again." Brooks croaked, desperate to reach out and hug her mother, but too afraid to wipe away the figment of her imagination.

Marliya smiled, softly. Brooks stared at her mother's face, soaking this up for as long as she could... But, then something caught her eye. Her brown eyes flickered down to her mother's neck, and she watched in slow motion as Marliya's head began being ripped from her neck. "You did your best." The hallucination whispered, before dropping to her side, her head rolling a few feet.