Untouched [minsung]

Chapter 73

I ran as fast as I could. I thought about one thing and one thing only: getting to Lee Know and Changbin.

I imagined finding them dead and shot in the house.

Finding them hurt on the way back into the woods and stumbling over them.

Finding them hurt in the kitchen and having no way to save them.

I thought about how Lee Know must've felt when he searched for me at the Hwang's bunker. He must've been so scared and fearing the worst, too.

I also thought about what it would be like to find them perfectly fine. I'd run and jump into Lee Know's arms and hold him forever again. His honey scent would envelop my senses, and we'd live happily ever after.

But I couldn't smell honey. My nostrils were filled with smoke, and I knew something was burning ahead of us. As we neared where the house should be, it got hotter and hotter, and when we entered the clearing, I saw that the house was on fire.

"Lee Know! Changbin!" I shouted as the blaze roared.

"Stay here!" I shouted at Seungmin and sprinted to the house and inside before he could stop me.

I held my sweatshirt over my face to filter out the smoke so I could breathe a little better. I searched the living room and kitchen first but saw no sign of Lee Know or Changbin.

I then checked the room we'd been staying in which must have been where the fire had started. Everything was gone. Luckily, it didn't seem like he'd been there either.

I ran up the partially burned stairs and checked Hyunjin's room first which was empty. Then Chan's room which was less burned since they had closed their door. I looked around for anything that might be important, and I grabbed the stuffed dog Seungmin had brought up here. It obviously mattered enough to him that he couldn't go a single night without it.

I then walked towards Changbin's room and hesitated before I opened the door. I really didn't want to find my best friend in a fire. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw it was empty in there too.

Nobody was here.

I went back down the stairs to get out before I got caught in the flames, but the steps collapsed underneath me. I fell half a story and twisted my ankle.

I tried to stand but it hurt to put weight on. The fire burned around me and I wondered if this was the end for me. I tried to yell for help but ended up inhaling smoke and wound up in a coughing fit on the floor. I army crawled to the kitchen and spotted a chair that I could use to stand up again.

I coughed aggressively and almost caused myself to fall back to the floor as I put my weight on the seat, but knew I had to make it out. I had to stay alive to find Lee Know and Changbin.

So I ignored the stabbing pain in my ankle, stood up, and took the last few steps outside as the building collapsed around me.

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"I've missed you," I heard and opened my eyes. I felt someone stroke my hair and place a kiss on my forehead.

I opened my eyes and sat up in shock to a perfectly happy and healthy Felix.

"Felix!" I embraced him tightly.

"Are you hungry?" he asked, and my stomach grumbled. He handed me half of a sandwich.

I bit into it immediately. "Mmm, what is this? It tastes smokey?"

"It's smoked turkey. It's pretty good, right?" He bit into his half as well.

I nodded in agreement. I closed my eyes and basked in the sunlight and bright blue sky. Birds sang in the distance. It felt perfect here.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked me.

"How are you here right now?"

"I think the question you should really be asking is how you're here right now."

I looked around at the green grass and perfect trees. There were even flowers of all colors sprinkled across the field. It definitely wasn't the backyard to the house. I had never been here before.

"Where am I?"

Felix inhaled and looked nervous to tell me the answer. But then it clicked. There was only one way for me to be with Felix right now.

"I'm dead?"

Felix gave me a sympathetic smile. "Kind of."

"Kind of?"

"You're sort of dead, sort of not dead. You're in purgatory."

"Oh..."

It's like an airport," he elaborated. "You can go step right outside and go back to reality. Or you can travel on to what's next."

I thought for a moment before asking, "What's next?" Curiosity about the afterlife had always plagued me.

"I can't tell you."

I laughed and it rang out like a beautiful chime around us.

"Why not?"

Felix shrugged. "It's part of the rules. You can go back and deal with everything between the families, be with Lee Know. Or you can come with me and find out."

Lee Know...

His face clouded my vision. I missed him.

I looked at Felix and saw how his eyes shined. He looked clean and warm.

"How's Lily?" I asked, and he smiled hugely.

"She's amazing. I've never been happier. Being with her was all I ever wanted."

It hurt my heart that Felix had to die to find happiness, but I was glad for him nonetheless. He deserved it more than any of us.

"You look really great," I smiled and took his hand in mine. He felt so real.

"I feel great. And you could too," he welcomed. He stood and walked towards an archway made by two trees whose branches connected at the center. "All you have to do is walk through here and you can see the afterlife. But if you choose to go back, you have to do that on your own."

"How? How do I do that myself?" I panicked. What if I ended up stuck here?

"Once you decide for sure, you'll wake up."

He placed his hand on mine, and like magic, calmness flooded over me. I nodded and hugged Felix close. He still smelled like apples. I wanted to remember it, so I inhaled deeply.

"You chose to go with Lily?" I asked him as I pulled away and memorized the freckles that danced across his nose.

Felix nodded. "Always."

He smiled back at me one last time before walking through the archway. I watched as he disappeared right before my eyes.

I laid back on the grass and contemplated my options. I could give up the chaotic and messy reality I was doomed to survive in and be with Felix. He seemed happy and content. Whatever was next had been somewhere he had found happiness. I was sure that I would, too.

But I knew that as long as Lee Know was alive it wasn't an option to leave him behind. Even if I found some sort of happiness wherever Felix was, it would be meaningless without Lee Know. I was destined to be with him, and I couldn't take the easy way out now. We'd been through too much for me to give up on him now.

So I closed my eyes and allowed thoughts of him to fill my mind.