The Cullen Effect

I Love Her Too..

Carlisle

I was walking down the hallway before I got bumped into. Unlike what I expected, the person was firmer than a regular human. This was one of my kind. Looking up, I catch a glimpse of dark curly hair and brown skin. I then caught a hint of a familiar scent from my past. It soon felt as if time stopped as I heard the voice of the woman I bumped into.

"Sorry.."

'That voice'

'It belonged to her. I know it did. How could I ever forget her voice?'

I saw my coworker Ryokan walking beside her. 'What is he doing with her? Where are they going? I have to see her.'

A million thoughts raced through my head as I turned the hall. I know I won't be satisfied until I'm positive it's her. 'But she died. I buried her myself.'

As I rounded the corner, I realized they weren't there anymore. I stopped dead in my tracks trying to make sure I didn't imagine her.

'But I've never imagined her so vividly before. She had to be real.'

'But I buried her personally. I remember the feeling of her cold unmoving body.. this is..'

I look down towards my hands. It's almost as if I could feel her the day I buried her.

Cold.

Lifeless.

But then I remember biting her in a state of panic and grief. 'Could she have..?'

"Dr. Cullen."

I snap out of my thoughts to see one of my coworkers standing in front of me with a file in her hand.

Regaining my compose, I answer the younger lady. "Yes, Ms Quinten? How may I help you?"

———-

As soon as I got home, it was late. My wife Esme was at the kitchen table reading a book. Seeing me walk in, she gently placed the book down on the table and smiles.

"Hi honey. How was your day?" She stands up and pulls me into an embrace. Returning the gesture, I respond. "It was lovely as always, dear." I sigh while looking down at her. A gentle smile tugging at my lips. "Luckily the hospital wasn't too busy today." I say before releasing myself from the hug and leaving her to her book.

———-

As I entered the hidden office in my home, my thoughts began to drift to Yn. The memories we shared when she was alive. Her soft, warm touch, her smile, her beautiful eyes. Everything about her entranced me.

She was the sweetest girl in the world. Yet, I ruined her. Because of me she died. I felt horrible. I had one job, yet I couldn't even do it.

I begin to think about my family. My wife Esme, my children, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper. I don't deserve them after what I did to her. I don't deserve to be loved again.

I slowly sink down in the office chair and lay my head down on the desk. "Oh, Yn...forgive me.."

"Please forgive me.."

"Carlisle ~"

I hear her faint voice calling my name from beside me. 'It's an illusion.' I try to convince myself.

"Carlisle~"

This time she sounds closer. Her voice, hauntingly sweet, and invading my mind. Almost like a plague.

"Car-lisle~"

She whispers into my ear. This time I can feel her touch on my shoulders. I quickly jump up and grab onto nothing. It seems as though her illusion has disappeared. Only leaving behind light traces of sweet, echoing, laughter.

I'm a sick man without her. How could this be? A corpse, still hanging onto what was once living after him. 'I have to be sure..'

'I have to be sure.. that was her.'

———-

The next afternoon, I see Ryokan walking in the hallway, probably going to his office.

"Excuse me, Ryokan," I stop the younger doctor in front of me. "Yes Dr. Cullen?" He responds blandly. The air seemed thick between us. I don't know why but there seems to be something keeping him from wanting to be near me. I can't lie, even I don't like being around the man in front of me. It's almost like we have some rivalry going on.

"May I speak with you privately, in my office." I put on a friendly smile in hopes of relieving some of the tension. "Sure." He says, moving to step beside me.

Once we step foot into the office, I close the door and take a seat at the coffee table on the left side of the room.

"So what did you want to talk about Cullen?" He asks monotonously. I place my hands together in a folded position and begin to talk. "Yesterday..I saw you walking down the halls with a young woman." I pause trying to figure out how to word out what I'm going to say next.

"What about her?" He asks, seemingly tensing up. I look him in the eyes before slowly continuing. "It just feels like I know her from somewhere." I smile trying to look less hostile. "It's her name... Yn by any chance?" My voice cracked towards the end of the sentence causing me to clear my throat.

Ryokan squinted slightly before questioning, "Yes. Why do you want to know?"

My chest began to tighten.

"Yn Ln?"

He nods once then tilts his head up some more, looking at me through his lower lashes. "Why? Do you know her personally?"

"Ah.. yes. She's an old friend of mine."

"How old?" He pressed further. Icily.

I chuckle forcefully. "Oh.. it doesn't matter. She probably doesn't remember me anyways, it's been so long."

"You didn't answer the question."

'What is wrong with this kid?'

"Don't worry, you can tell me. After all were the same species." The air only seemed to get thicker as he said that. How could I have ignored it before? Ryokan felt completely off from the start.

"Over 94 years." I say. Smile completely gone from my features. "How long have you known Yn, Ryokan?"

"94 years."

'He's known her since the year she died?'

He straightens up completely. "Well, if that's all you needed, I'll be off. I have work to do Dr Cullen." Ryokan says my name as if it was a needle on his tongue before leaving, closing the door behind him.

I squint my eyes a bit at the behavior of the younger man. I had no reason to be spiteful towards him. We barely even interact. Yet he feels so much disdain towards me? I wonder why..

'Maybe it has something to do with Yn?'

Ryo

I scoff out loud when I arrive in my office, slamming the door behind me. "Tsk. Who the hell does he think he is?" I pace back and forth in an attempt to calm myself down. Why was I getting so worked up? It's not like Yn is mine anyway.

But she's been by my side for years. As I, hers. Not him.

" Who does he think he is just coming back out of nowhere trying to claim her again? After leaving her for dead." I shake my head in distain. "She won't go back to him. I'll make sure of it." I say aloud before lightning a cigarette and placing it between my lips.

Inhale

"After all, I love her too."

Exhale