P E N A L T Y | c. ѕaιnz jr.

8| Liar

S. Rivera

I couldn't stay at the hotel that night. No matter the insistent texts from Carlos, I told him that I wasn't going to listen. Eventually, his texts became less frequent and finally dissipated. I asked Esme if I could stay with her and she agreed then said we could take after we've had some rest.

I'm awake now from my sleep and I could smell Esme making banana and Nutella pancakes in the morning, that was always her signature. I got up from the couch and walked over to her, still in my clubbing clothes. Of course she asked, "Why didn't you stay at your hotel room last night? Well technically this morning because it was around 3 am when you arrived at my flat."

"I had to get away from Carlos, I can't stand the man," I answered.

Liar.

Even my own subconscious hates me. She nodded then said, "Of course you do, I don't know why I was so upset about your arranged marriage with him. You don't even like him like that. Look, I'm sorry Sal. I really didn't mean to lash out, I was just caught off-guard that's all."

I feel so awful. Knowing what I'd just done last night, if she hadn't texted, I knew I wouldn't have stopped. I should've never kissed him, and I should've kept it strictly business between me and Carlos. Him and I? We're not supposed to mix or even make sense together. Esme and him made sense. I watched as my best friend circled around with a fresh plate of pancakes for me, blissfully unaware of the betrayal I'd done just a few hours ago.

I'm so pathetic. I hadn't realised that I was starting to cry from my own guilt until I heard her say, "Hey why are you crying?" I quickly wiped away my tears and hugged her to hide the clear cut guilt on my face. Esme started soothing my back and said, "Hey, hey, shhh. Shh. It's alright, you didn't do anything wrong. I just reacted badly. I'm sorry."

But I did do something wrong. I kissed her boyfriend. I kissed the man she loves and has been desperately wanting for him to say he felt the same. The same man that she'd defended from all my criticisms of lack of commitment, I kissed. I don't deserve Esme and...I didn't have the heart to tell her. I can't lose her, she's all I have.

"I just missed you," I muttered.

Liar.

"I missed you too," she said as she hugged me even tighter, "But you reek of alcohol, I'm surprised you didn't get a hangover from however many you had last night."  I quickly pulled away from her embrace, feeling the guilt squeeze my heart, "I have to go."

"What? So soon?!," she asked in surprise, "I just made you pancakes."

"I don't want my papá to think that I'm evading our deal by abandoning Carlos," I said and there was a flicker of hurt in Esme's eyes which she quickly hid away with a smile. I quickly held her hand in mine then said, "If you want to go see him, go see him. I don't mind. He's yours."

She gave me a grateful smile then replied, "I'll text him. Thank you Sal. I'm sorry you have to be stuck in an arranged marriage with him, even if you don't really like him like that."

"Yeah," I said and I quickly waved goodbye to Esme and left her flat. I couldn't take it, I had to set the boundaries for myself and for Esme. I had no choice but to go back to the hotel and talk to Carlos.

__

C. Sainz Jr.

I have never been so worried in my entire life. I'd texted Salomé so many times and there was still no answer. I didn't want to call her because I didn't want her to think I was too eager to have her back in the hotel. I sunk into the couch, frustrated. Charles gave me a sympathetic pat on the shoulder as he said, "She'll turn up, she's not too dumb that she'll cause her father to be suspicious."