BIG HUFFS OF BREATH WERE HEARD FROM THE BACK GARDEN OF THE RENGOKU ESTATE.
your teeth were grit as you swung your wooden bokken back and forth, under the surveillance of busy hashira kyojuro rengoku.
your stomach clenched seeing him watch you with a smile, a frown presenting itself on your face.
you continued to swing, but faced him.
"rengoku-san, you don't have to stay and watch me train. i know you're busy and have much more important things to do"
he just grins brightly, "nonsense! and how many times have i told you to call me kyojuro!"
you look to the side, frowning deeper and just sighing, "whatever"
you continue on training, kyojuro shouting out praises and encouragements that made your heart heavy.
i mean, why would he lie to you?
why would he tell you you're getting better? that you're really strong?
you obviously weren't so why would he lie to you?
your hands clench around the hilt of your katana as your furrow your eyebrows, annoyed at the man.
why was he bothering to waste his time on you? you were no good.
you weren't picking up on anything, you couldn't master flame breathing if your life depended on it.
you were a disappointment. constantly letting kyojuro down with everything you did.
with every little slip up or mistake, you could feel his faith in you waning. well, you couldn't technically feel it, but you knew if it was you, your faith would be long gone, so surely kyojuro feels the same.
amidst your troubling thoughts, you took a wrong step forward and stumbled on a rock, slipping up and hitting yourself in the cheek with the bokken, failing your move.
you let out an annoyed cry, tossing the bokken on the ground and storming away, ignoring kyojuro's calls of your name.
you ravage through the house, locking yourself in the bathroom and shaping yourself into a heap, burying your face in your hands and hitting your clenched fist against your forehead.
stupid! stupid! stupid! why can't i get anything right?!
angry tears streamed down your cheeks as you clenched your fists so hard your palms had crescent shaped cuts, small lines of blood oozing.
you try and hold in your cries, deeming yourself weak for letting yourself get worked up over this.
