Mistaken for Love

Chapter Thirty One

I felt burden.

Was I guilty of what I told Josh? I didn't expect myself to say what I said to him, but I felt like he'd only stop if I say that even if... I really wanted to... do it with him.

I covered my face with my palms.

"Ma'am?"

I lifted my gaze at my secretary, she was holding a bouquet.

"A delivery just arrived, Ma'am"

"Who is it from, Dana?"

"The delivery guy didn't say, Ma'am, he just looked for you and brought these"

She put it on my table, a bouquet and a brown paperbag.

"Okay, thank you"

She smiled and head out.

I sighed, the white roses looked fresh, I checked the paperbag, it was food.

Salad, organic orange juice and some chicken teriyaki.

No note, but I know who'd give these to me.

And I'm not assuming it, Josh was the only one who knows my favorite and this was not the first time he sent me these.

The more I feel guilty every time he sends gifts.

I groaned and closed my eyes tight.

Its been weeks since it happened, and Josh doesn't falter a single day, if not flowers, food and sometimes both.

I had my period so I informed him about it.

He slowly nodded, I even tried a pregnancy test for him to believe me, Yasmin stopped her tracks when she saw us talking and me showing Josh the test.

Her eyes went to me and to Josh, back and forth.

"I'll just be back later, then" she said.

And she left my office.

I sighed and wrapped the test in tissue before putting it back in the box so I could throw it away.

"Sapphire..."

"I don't want to talk about what happened years ago, please, I want to keep those words unsaid"

I looked at outside, my eyes were welling up, I didn't want him to see it.

"I know what happened years ago hurt you, but there's something I need to tell you, for you to understand--"

"I already understand what you did, I don't want to dwell on it now, I've moved on, Josh, please, just... let's just keep it in the past"

"I have so much to tell you..."

"Please, I don't want to hear it, I'm sorry, I just can't deal with these anymore, you did what you did, and I have accepted it already, so please..."

"Sapphire, if you could just give me a chance--"

I faced him and wiped my tears.

"Damn it, Josh, what's still unclear? I told you, I don't want to talk about it! I don't want us to talk, I don't want anything to do with you anymore!"

His eyes bloodshot and pained as I shouted at him.

"Six years, and you decided to comeback, show up and talked about our past, like it wasn't a big deal..." I wiped my tears, "I was okay, I was healing, Josh, and now that you're here, everything came back, every pain resurfaced just by seeing you"

He tried to reach for me but I denied it, I avoided him.

"I don't want us to talk, we have nothing to talk about, you could have just stayed away like what you did six years ago"