The funhouse of murder • Stray Kids X reader

79 ☠️

My entire body felt heavy, and yet I couldn't fall asleep. Every attempt I had made had failed miserably. Even though we had eventually agreed on sleeping in the bed with the three of us, nothing worked. And yet, being in the middle, with an arm draped over my waist to hold me tightly in a protective manner, I couldn't move an inch. As soon as I'd lift my head, Minho would notice the weight shift off his arm, gently pushing my head back down with his fingertips. And when I tried to turn to my left side, Changbin would pull me back to him in an instant, his strong hand remaining on my waist.

After our disagreement yesterday, we hadn't exactly talked again. Short words were exchanged, such as a simple, emotionless goodnight, but nothing further. After hearing Minho clearly agree with Changbin, it was obvious there was no convincing them any further. No matter what I'd say or how I'd prove useful, they'd disagree. But I couldn't let go of the feeling that it could lead me somewhere. Somewhere other than what fate had in store for us. It was bugging me, more than I liked to admit. And still, there was no way to continue right now, with the two with no intention of letting me go.

I shifted my weight to my elbows, trying to push my upper body up once more. Almost instantly, Changbin's grip tightened again, and Minho's free hand already searched for my head. "Guys, I've got to pee," I muttered annoyed. "Do so in the morning, I'm trying to sleep," Minho uttered back, rather than pushing my head back, draping his free arm over my shoulders. "Can't you do so without me here?" I asked back, throwing my head back. "I can't sleep without hugging someone," he replied, leaning over, his breath hot on my skin.

I finally decided to make a swift turn to face Minho, feeling Changbin immediately pressing my back against his chest in his sleep rather than turning my back towards him this time. Minho took the opportunity to yet again inch closer, my head resting on his arm now leaning against his chest, his head on top of mine. A familiar, uncomfortable feeling washed over me as another flashback of the past showed before my eyes. My breathing became more rapid, a teardrop rolling down my face.

"Y/N?" Minho asked, still groggy at first, soon realising there was something wrong. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?" he hushed, now leaning up as well. The palm of his hand rested on my cheek, his thumb tenderly wiping away the tear. "I want out, I need out. I can't do this," I spat out frantically, my voice quavering. Minho didn't waste any time, pulling me right out of Changbin's grip, who luckily continued sleeping soundlessly. I sat up at the end of the bed, burying my head in my hands, desperately trying to slow down my breathing.

In... and out...

"Y/N?"

In... and out...

"Talk to me," Minho whispered.

In... and out...

"Hey," he calmed me down, his hand touching my bare shoulder.

My breathing stopped, my body freezing right in my spot. He removed his hand again, as if it finally clicked in his brain. "Something happened, didn't it? In your past?" He let out a deep sigh, squatting down in front of me. "Y/N, look at me. What happened?" My eyes met his, but nothing but tears came out. Even though I wanted to shout it all out, wanted to tell him all that happened, wanted to yell just how much I hated this place, how much I did not want to go through what was to come tomorrow, nothing came out but the quiet sobs.

"You know," Minho started talking amidst the silence, "you remind me of Jisung." My brows furrowed, feeling the tears lessen in confusion. "When he first came to our home, he was just as closed off as you were, especially in the beginning. He didn't trust anyone either, keeping to himself, and yet so clearly in pain. But... he wouldn't let me in. No matter how much effort I put into it, he made sure to keep me at a distance. Until he broke down one day, when everything became too much to bear alone.

A small smile spread on his face, looking down to the ground. "I know I said I needed some space from him, but I still care about him deeply, you know? I know I could never force you to tell me what happened in the past, or that I can't make you trust me any more, I've experienced that first hand, but..." His voice quieted down, trying to find the right words. "There's just something familiar in you. A familiar feeling I got when we were able to give Jisung a warm home. So, Y/N? Will you come home?"

My sobs only became louder, words spatting right out off my mouth before I could even try to string them into a cohesive story. A home wasn't supposed to make you cry. A home wasn't supposed to make you feel miserable. No, I finally realized now. A home was supposed to give you comfort. Something I had been robbed off for so many years. A warmth I had missed out on all this time, and had started feeling with the people here. A home I might again soon be robbed off.

I let myself fall forward, right into Minho's arms, crying out all the things I never got to say. And while I cried and screamed, Minho didn't even look up. He just held me, a feeling reminding me of the person I wished was here the most. The one person that had finally felt like a home was supposed to feel like. Minho lightly pushed me back, cupping my face to wipe away the tears.

"It's going to be okay, Y/N. You're home."