The funhouse of murder • Stray Kids X reader

68 ☠️

There was no tactic. No new strategy, no plan. Nothing in our minds that could make up for losing Felix and Seungmin. Changbin had laid out all Seungmin had told him, but while everyone tried to keep it in mind, there was nothing they could think of they could currently do differently. Nobody had the energy to get together to carefully reselect teams, check on everyone's qualities again that could possibly replace those of the two boys. We would see what the best action was in the heat of the moment. That was our new plan. It wasn't perfect, soundproof, or even remotely smart, but nobody could find the strength to disagree.

Even after everyone freshened up, the mood remained dark and gloomy, no matter how hard they seemed to try to stay positive. Some looked like they gave up all together as reality bursted the bubble of unrealistic confidence, while others were desperately struggling to find ways to continue, take Chan and Changbin for example. They had been going at it for an hour already, and yet nothing seemed to work out for them. Every time they thought they had a good idea, it was instantly washed away as there was yet another flaw to it. Nothing seemed good enough anymore. And me? I'd once again claimed the couch to lay on, doing nothing else but laying with open eyes, staring at the shimmering lights, listening along to the various sounds around me.

The only difference this time was my legs resting on Jeongin's, who gave the excuse of being tired and needing to rest comfortably. Of course this would seem like a normal, valid reason, but if there was anything I learned about Jeongin this past week, it was that he desperately needed comfort of those around him, and now that he seemed to hate his now former best friend, I was probably the one he felt closest to, given he seemed to stick around me more now. I didn't necessarily mind it, if it brought him comfort, then why not, but it was making me curious on what excuse he'd find next to be around me, one of the very few things able to spark some reaction out of me, other than his thumb continuesly rubbing my right lower leg.

Minho stood up with a sigh, grabbing my attention as he and Jisung had not moved out of their hugging position for the past hour. "I'm going to cook us all something, even if no one is hungry, we still need to eat to regain strength. Looks like some of us could really use it," he noted, glancing over at Hyunjin, Jeongin and I. Quite frankly, I hadn't heard a word from Hyunjin since we got out of the last zone. I hadn't seem him even try to do anything but act like a lifeless zombie. Was he still affected by the drugs? Or was he simply processing all that happened in his own way? I couldn't figure it out, but at the same time couldn't find myself care enough to ask. Care enough for anything, still, not even the dinner that was slowly starting to smell better by the minute.

Not that my stomach was in agreement though, given the way too loud rumble it just made. And for the first time in hours, I heard a chuckle from the corner of the room, followed by all heads turning to Hyunjin, who just as quickly went back to his quiet self. And for the first time yet again, I let out a laugh too. I couldn't even figure out why, it just came out, followed by more tears flowing down through the smile. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, but I just wanted it to stop. I was a mess between being emotionless, and feeling all of my emotions hit me at the same time. I honestly felt wrecked, and not even sure why I was still here. My only reason for being here was now gone, and even when I thought I was finally able to get close to someone, I lost them too, just like mom. Why couldn't anything in my life go right?

I was almost immediately pulled into Jeongin's arms, letting the tears silently fall down in his chest. "It was one of those two, wasn't it?" Jeongin quietly whispered into my ear. "The person you liked," he added after. I nodded, Seungmin's name falling from my lips, barely audible through the sobs. Instead of being let a little looser as I expected, Jeongin only pulled me in even closer to him, his right hand stroking my still damp hair softly, while his other was supporting my back, inching around my waist. He didn't say anything, simply holding me until I calmed down again. I could feel him shaking too, but he didn't let anything out, trying his best to keep himself together.

Another hand gave my head a short stroke, making me look up to see Changbin smile softly, him too with clear tears in his eyes. "Why don't you join us for dinner? Get some strength back, you seen like you could use it," he offered, giving Jeongin a pet on the back as well. I finally looked back, most of them were already at the table. No one seemed okay, but yet everyone was still going on, their motivations now simply changed. Though they still wanted to get out of this place, their optimistic determination was now simply changed, as now they seemed inflicted by regret and fear.

Despite not wanting to get up, I let out a sigh, slowly getting out of Jeongin's arms, the feeling of warmth that I now associated with Seungmin, once again leaving me, the only reminder I had of him now yet again gone. It had only been such a short time, and yet he had changed me in so many ways already. The feeling I had hated for so long, was so terrified of, I now for the first time longed for, more than anything. No matter what I ate, how much I slept, was comforted by Changbin and Jeongin, nothing made me feel the way he made me feel. And I was probably never going to experience it ever again.

Because here we were, standing ready to now dive right into the next zone, and who knew whether it would be the last.