Yes, My Queen (Black Butler)

Chapter 36

I didn't sleep well, even with Sebastian's arms around me. I couldn't tell if it was a vision or a nightmare, but my mind replayed the scenes in the dungeon with the red haired demon over and over again. With the coronation being just a week away, it could have just been dreams fueled by my anxiety. Or, it could be another vision, warning me once again of what was to come.

When I awoke, Sebastian was still asleep beside me. It was a rare sight to see him resting, so I kept myself snuggled in his arms, enjoying the moment.

When he awoke a while later, I'd nearly dozed off again. He held me closer for a moment before releasing me and standing.

"I sense you've had a rough night," he said, facing me as I sat up.

I gave a slight nod. "I keep seeing myself in that dungeon..."

"Anything new?"

I shook my head.

He sat on the edge of the bed beside me, then caressed my cheek. I leaned into the touch as he spoke, "You may rest a while longer if you wish. I do not believe they have anything you must do until this evening."

"What am I supposed to do?"

Sebastian smiled. "Your first dress fitting."

"Already?"

"It isn't finished yet. The seamstress just wants to make sure everything is going to fit before she sews it."

"That makes sense, I guess."

He chuckled, then used his hand still on my cheeks to pull me forward. He kissed me softly before pulling away and standing.

"And what will you be doing?" I asked him as he walked over to his closet.

"Overseeing the preparations and helping Lisa make sure our guards are ready for anything, unfortunately." He entered the closet, and I could hear the sounds of shifting clothes. "I'd much rather stay here with you, but we can't leave everything to Lisa alone."

"But she isn't alone. She has the whole staff here to help her."

Sebastian emerged from his closet, wearing an outfit very similar to the one he always does. "Yes, but someone who has known you for quite some time should help her in setting up your coronation. It has to be perfect for you. Besides, I'll have a small role to play in it myself."

That piqued my interest. "Really? What will you be doing?"

He simply smiled. "That is something I cannot share at this time. Just know that I will make sure your coronation is a memorable one."

I smiled back. "I should hope so. It's the only one I'll have."

With that, he turned and left the room. Once he was gone, I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to sleep any more and see the images from my visions. I was scared enough of the future as it was. I didn't need the reminder.

Instead, my mind went back to our conversation before we'd fallen asleep. I couldn't believe I'd actually told him what was on my mind. I usually try to make sure he knows everything, but I'd been so embarrassed just thinking about marriage that I'd hidden myself in my room for hours. Then when he asked, I hardly hesitated to tell him.

But one thing that my sleepy brain had let go unnoticed was the fact that this conversation had been on his mind, too!

Had he been planning on proposing to me soon? At my coronation, maybe?

Had I ruined it by telling him I wasn't ready for marriage yet?

I slumped back into the pillows. I meant what I said. I just hope I didn't hurt his feelings.

I sat up again quickly, shaking my head to clear the negativity. No, I hadn't hurt his feelings. He was the one who always said we would move at my pace. We were planning for our forever. Marriage could happen someday, but I couldn't let it distract me from what was currently at hand. I was to be crowned as the queen of demons, and quite possibly be taken prisoner by a demon who seems to want total anarchy. The last thing I needed was for my thoughts to be divided.

With that, I forced myself out of bed and walked over to my own closet. Stripping off the clothes from the day before, I picked out a new dress, a dark pink one that went down to my knees, and got myself ready for the day. I wasn't going to let myself dwell on any negativity. I refused to think about my anxieties of my future with Sebastian or my recurring vision.

Once I'd dressed and pulled my hair back to its usual ponytail, I left the bedroom. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do while I waited for my fitting in the evening, but I knew I needed a distraction if I wanted to have a good day. There were only six days until I was to become queen, and I planned to make the most of them.

As I walked down the stairs and into the foyer, I noticed Sarah and Jasmine standing there, speaking to each other softly. They stopped when they saw me, both with guilty looks on their faces.

"Chrys, I wanted to apologize," Jasmine said, looking at the floor. "Everything that's happening is so new and exciting, I got a little carried away and didn't think about how much stress all of this has been putting on you."

"I'm sorry, too," Sarah added. "I shouldn't have said the things I did yesterday. I was out of line."

I stared at them. Did they really think I'd been mad at them? Or were they worried they'd only further added to my anxieties?

"It's okay. I wasn't mad or anything," I told them. "You are both free to speak your minds. I'm sorry I let my anxieties get the best of me."

Jasmine ran up and met me at the bottom of the steps. "Chrys, don't apologize. We were in the wrong. Even though we can speak for ourselves doesn't mean we should without thinking. We came here with you because we didn't want to lose you. We wanted to help make this whole destiny thing a bit easier for you. And it seems all I've been able to do is make you worry."

I pulled her into a hug as her cheeks became wet with fresh tears. "Jasmine, that's not true. You've both helped me a great deal, and I'll be forever grateful to you for deciding to join me on this journey. Yes, I'm scared, but we'll all get through it together."

Jasmine pulled away and nodded, wiping the tears from her face and attempting to brighten her mood. "So, what were you planning to do today?"

"Well, I don't have anything I have to do until this evening, so I was thinking about maybe helping around the castle. Surely there is something I can do to help the others prepare."

"Well, we've been told to keep you out of the throne room," Sarah said. "They want that one to be a surprise."

That confused me slightly, but I just shrugged. "Then I'll try somewhere else. Do you want to join me?"

They both nodded excitedly, then we left the suite together.