Ophelia Mikaelson (Poly Mikaelsons)

Chapter 4 - Growing Tensions

"Fia," Kol breathes in shock at what I've just admitted. I've deeply hurt him, I can tell.

But I can't find it within myself to take back what I said. It's true, I don't have a place here anymore. I've been away too long, my family have moved on without me.

Klaus has a baby on the way, Elijah is enamoured with Hayley...

Even Kol and Rebekah are still readjusting to me being back, it's not normal like it used to be. And that's so painful to realise. Us all being together again isn't as easy and effortless as it used to be.

They all started to move on and grow without me. Now I feel like I'm holding them back.

"Fia you're our wife. All of ours. Your place is here with us, always and forever," Kol kisses my head as I rest against his chest.

"You have Hayley now," I acknowledge verbally. "She has to be the focus of this family because she carries Klaus' child. They must be protected above all else."

Talking about the baby still makes my heart clench painfully. I don't think that feeling will ever disappear.

It's just not fair.

"Maybe I should move out for a bit to give those three some space," I suggest and Kol knows exactly who I'm talking about. Klaus, Elijah and Hayley.

He remains silent so he doesn't get angry at my plan to leave, his jaw tightening as he grinds his teeth together in frustration. To make matters worse, I hadn't realised Beks had been overhearing our conversation. She walks in and sits down next to me. I've upset her too.

"Honey please don't leave us, the boys will be lost without you too."

"They won't even notice if I'm gone," I choke out as tears stream down my cheeks. "They've lived years without me now, how can I come back and expect everything to be as it was before?"

"It will be as it was before, we all just need time," Kol says gently but I notice his crestfallen face. "They will notice if you leave, I guarantee it. They won't take it well whatsoever."

I debate leaving for more reasons than one. They don't need me, I don't know if they even want me, and I can't cope seeing Hayley skip around with my husbands following behind her, agreeing to her every wish.

Why couldn't it have been me? I want to give my family a baby. It should have been me.

Hayley is forever bound to our family now. While she is a sweet young woman who is oblivious to the dynamics in our family, I can't stand to see my husbands give her more attention than me.

Does that make me selfish?

"Why did this have to happen?" I cry and cry while Rebekah rubs my back, listening and allowing me to get it all out.

"What does she have that I don't?" I sob.

The siblings exchange a worried look and say nothing but I easily answer my own question.

"It's the baby isn't it?"

Their silence says more than any spoken refute of my conclusion. That's how I know I'm right.

The one thing that can heal our family I can't provide. A child. A Mikaelson heir. Innocent hope.

I'm not good enough as a wife and I never will be.