Lost Without You

Chapter 30

3 months later...

I walked to Kinsley's door, my hand hovering over the doorknob and as I turned the doorknob slowly, the hinges let out a soft creak. When I peered into Kinsley's room, I saw her sitting on the floor, next to the play house, completely absorbed in her play. Kinsley's eyes were bright with concentration as she moved the tiny furniture around. She carefully placed a miniature bed in the center of the room, then added a tiny pillow and blanket. Next, she picked a doll with curly brown hair and dressed her in a pink nightgown before placing her in the bed. As she worked, Kinsley hummed a tune under her breath, lost in her own little world. 

She signed to herself: "Time to wake up!"

She moved the doll down the stairs into the kitchen: "Eat pancake time!"

I smiled as I stood in the doorway, watching Kinsley play for several minutes. Then Kinsley looked up, her eyes bright with excitement as she saw me standing in the doorway. She sets down her dolls and ran toward me.

Her arms flung open, and she jumped up: "Mama!"

I hugged her back tightly: "You ready to go?"

She nodded excitedly, bouncing up and down with excitement: "I got my coat and my shoes!"

Hand in hand, we made our way out of her bedroom toward the front door. Jay scooped her up into his arms, carrying her to the car. The snow crunching underneath our feet. As Jay buckled Kinsley into her carseat, he turned around and smiled at me. 

I jumped up and down, my voice filled with giddy enthusiasm: "We're going to hear the baby's heartbeat!"

Jay's eyes sparkled with excitement. His arms encircled me, lifting me off the ground, and we twirled around in a moment of pure happiness before he gently set me back down. We both got in the car and drove to the hospital. I placed my hand on my noticeable bump.

As I scrolled through my baby app, I gasped: "Jay, the baby is a size of a bell pepper!"

Jay laughed, his eyes twinkling with amusement: "A bell pepper? That's an odd choice to compare the baby's size to"

We stepped out of the car, the chilly winter air nipping at our cheeks. Kinsley held my hand tightly, her small fingers intertwined with mine, as we made our way inside. Her eyes widen with wonder as we walked through the halls. We found a seat in the corner of the waiting room, where Kinsley sat beside me, giggling with excitement. Jay approached the reception desk and signed me in, providing the necessary paperwork. As we waited, Kinsley leaned against me, her head resting on my shoulder. A few minutes later, my doctor motioned us to the examination room. She greeted us warmly and began checking my vitals. Then she asked for a urine sample which I ran to the bathroom and did. With a smile, my doctor moved on to the ultrasound machine, preparing to perform the ultrasound. I rolled my shirt up while she warns me how the gel would be cold before putting it on my growing bump. Kinsley sat on Jay's lap, leaning toward me. 

As the screen came to life, displaying the grainy black-and-white images of our unborn baby, a wave of emotion washed over me. I started to tear up

Kinsley's smile grew bigger as she watched the screen, her small hand reaching out to touch my belly: "Mama! Is that the baby?"

I nodded, trying to contain my tears. I could see the head and the baby's legs moving in the fluid-filled sac.

As the ultrasound continued, my doctor pointed out different features of the baby, explaining what we were seeing on the screen. Kinsley listened carefully, her eyes wide with fascination. Jay's hand rested on my shoulder, a silent gesture of support.