GALLAVICH untitled

cheating

HI THIS IS AN ADVERTISEMENT so basically this story is like the evololved version of my other story shattered reflections so go read it because it's ian's struggle with an eating disorder depression sh suicide all that so this story will now be his relapse kinda if that wasn't already established so yea too the story!!

i'm thinking about monica it's hard without her i know i'm supposed to be independent and not want my mom like a little kid but i can't help it she was my support system for awhile almost two years then she proved me wrong that you can get sober and stay sober i pull up my sleeves my wrists are covered in scars as if the rubber band wasn't a big enough sign i used to cut the scars are like never ending temptation to feel the stinging sensation and feeling all the stress release from your body 2 years ago i stopped cutting for good or not for good just knowing monica relapsed around this time is enough to send chills down my spine i could walk down those stairs i've walked down to eat breakfast or leave the house but instead of doing those healthy things i could walk up to the drawer open it and pick out a knife and drag the blade across my wri- mickey is on the phone i snap the rubber band on my wrist
|no i'm just chilling with a friend|-mi
i've heard that come out of mickeys mouth so many times i don't even think about it but now that he's so out it's weird
2 days later
yknow i never thought there was anyone like me and mickey but i was proven wrong mickey is definitely cheating and i've never been so close to relapsing and i mean im sober and actively want to cut not a bad day and im drunk but no im sitting at the kitchen counter with lip snapping the bracelet
|what's wrong|-lip
|nothing|-i
|ok|-l
|mickeys cheating on me and i want to cut that's what's wrong|-i
he nods slowly
|thanks for the trauma dump|-l
|yep i'm going to work now|-i
he nods once again i put my shoes on and leave
at work
i get into the building it's hot as fuck i take off my jacket the first time i've done this and immediately sues eyes are drawn to my arms i never realized how many people look at me until i'm wanting to cut
|woah ian i've never not seen you wear a jacket this uh new your arms are visible|-s
|yep i know|-i
mickeys texts me
[gonna be out late don't wait up]
[i wouldn't have either way❤️]
[lol]
wowwwww he really doesn't give a fuck
at home 6 pm
relapsing at its finest 913 days i was sober 913 fucking days 2 and a half years i didn't look at a knife and want to hurt myself but again i'm on this cold floor sitting in blood and tears dreading the minute
|ian?|-v
i look up veronica fighting through the tears i smile she bends down
|cmon let's get you cleaned up before mickey gets home he's got a surprise for you|-v
i shake my head i feel like i'm 15 again
|hes cheating on me|-i
i stand up she rubs my back
|why do you say that|-v
|he hasn't talked to me in 3 days he's always on his phone or not home and even when he does talk to me it's a text and he doesn't even sound like he cares|-i
|baby i can promise you i really don't think he's cheating so let's clean up your arms get changed and go to the alibi|-v
i nod
AT THE ALIBI Vs POV
i walk up to mickey leaving ian to sit down a few seats from mickey
|i know we set this up and everything but maybe don't do it tonight ian just needs you to sit and comfort him|-v
|why what's wrong what happened|-mi
|if he wants to tell you that's his choice but it's been a terrible day for him and i don't think he wants to even admit it to himself so just go sit with him|-v
carl walks up to us
|so when is this party gonna start|-c
|its not baby maybe in a few weeks mickey that sound good?|-v
|what happened tell me|-mi
|i really can't just know this is probably one of the worst days of his life and he might  just need you to help him|-v
MICKEYS POV
i get up and sit next to him leaning my head on his shoulder i notice kevin's skull hoodie the one ian used to wear when he was.. that's what's happening ian broke and he just relapsed a tear drops from my eye ian looks like he did when he heard monica died absolutely destroyed and it's killing me not being able to help i have to sit here and act like i don't know he relapsed, 913 days ago ian and i  both made an agreement that if he stopped cutting I'd stop doing illegal shit i didn't believe in ian so i gave up trying he followed through though i feel guilty like i could have prevented this happening like i played a part in this