"Excuse me, but who are you?"
That phrase completely ripped my heart away. After four years, that's the first thing I hear from him
When an accident happens that reunites two estranged people who used to be each other's first love, usually there is...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I walked down a dark and dim alleyway, there were men who were looking creepy at me and with curiosity. There were no women in sight. I continued walking down the alleyway taking in my surroundings or the trash bags that were piled up.
Where is this place?
What am I doing here?
I walked even further to see a man leaning on the dirty wall wearing a nicely fitted suit. The first few buttons of his shirt were undone and his tie. I looked up at his face to see a hint of familiarity in his face. Something about him made me feel safe
I wanted to ask him where is this place but I didn't expect the words to come out of my mouth
"Excuse me? What are the hardest drugs that you have on hand?" I asked, taken back by my words. Why the fuck am I asking for drugs?
He looked up at me looking straight into my eyes and that's when it hit me. It was my dad, but he looked very very young.
"I beg your pardon Miss" He said crocking his eyebrow
I meant to ask where is this place and how to get out of here but there was no control of my words
"I'm looking for the hardest drugs on the market. Happen to know where I can buy them?" I asked, my dad looked at me tilting his head slightly in curiosity, studying me closely. Why the fuck am I asking for drugs? From my own father?
"You got the wrong guy, sweet panda" my dad said and my body froze as he called me by my mom's nickname, even though I never knew the story behind it "and it's certainly not the best solution to get over a breakup"
"Is it that obvious?" I asked
"Mascara smeared all over your eyes, you are dressed up for a date. Wearing an expensive perfume from Xerjoff" he said pointing things out that I didn't even know, "seems like the date didn't go well"
"You know what. Its okay I will sort it out" I said about to turn to walk away
"That was me exactly fifty years ago" I heard a familiar voice behind me. I turned to see myself by the beach and it was the earliest hours of the dawn as the night sky was still taking over the sky and there were hints of sun rays coming out of the horizon.
My mom was sitting on the sand with a white summer dress.
I felt my eyes fill with tears as I quietly when and sat beside her
"Didn't I tell you? You will never forget your first love"
"You did" I said chuckling as I felt tears well up in my eyes "What about you mother? Do you still love your first love?" I asked
"I did love him." she said
"Was it dad?" I asked
"No. it's not. You dad saved me from him. If I stayed with my first love I would be dead before my twenties" she said
"Mom" I gasped it was my first time hearing that
"It's embarrassing to admit this but I was always jealous of your relationship between you and Yeonjun." she admitted "My first love was cruel and selfish, he was treating our relationship like a business project. By the time your father came around I swore off any heirs and I was very very depressed. I was contemplating turning to drugs, so I went to the famous alleyway where they selled drugs. I saw your dad, thought he was a drug dealer and asked him to give me the hardest drug he has."
"I was planning and taking the drugs and hoped to never wake up again but I never thought that would be the start of our relationship. So yes I really do mean it when I say your dad saved my life, he could have easily told me where to find the hardest drugs but instead he took care of me"
"That's when I realised that's what I needed this whole time. Not a man who is wealthy and has his shit together. Your dad didn't have that, he was starting his own company where he didn't even have his parents support, losing lots of money, had a traumatising past but he knew how to take care of me. He showed me what safety was after a long time of walking on eggshells. I'm not gonna sit here and beautify my relationship with him because there was dark times in our relationship"
"What worked for your father and I is healing ourselves first before getting back together, but honestly sometimes you need your partner to heal you as well." she said
"But it's not that easy mom." I said
"Relationships are not easy, Ah Rang. That's why I never let you go into relationships when you were thirteen even up to your twenties. Because on a serious note a thirteen year old knows what to look for a partner, even up to your twenties. You need to know what you have and who you are to know what to look for in a partner. That's what you should be doing before you get into a relationship" She said "and Yeonjun fills the other half of you perfectly"
"I know. I know he does" I admitted "But im scared to hurt him again"
"It's okay to be scared, but you have to try at least. You need to heal Yeonjun so you can heal yourself" She said "Miscarriage is not one's grief its two people griefing. There is no better support than to have someone who is going though the same things as you are"
I looked up at her to see she was genuine and sincere about the words she told me.
"Yeonjun is a good man, it will be sad to see you let go of him" My mom said. I nodded slowly
"I miss you mom" I managed to say through the tightness of my throat
"I miss you too, my little daughter" she said as a small smile pulled on her face.
That's when I heard a toddler laugh behind me. I looked to see a child around three to four years old playing in the sand, I couldn't see who it was as their back was facing me and they were busy stopping on the sand castle
"Yah Choi Yeon Hee be careful"
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
