Chapter Two

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On my way to Sara's office, I keep thinking if I should tell her about meeting Ash or not. Being the only one who knows Ash other than me and my brother, I would really like to know what she has to say about it, although me and Ash kind of hate each other for what he did. A part of me still sees him as an ally rather than as an enemy.

I make my way to her office and see her preparing the session. "Hello, Ezekiel," Sara greets me with a smile this time, rather than the usual lack of attention I get every time I enter her office and greet her. The office seemed different this time. She got a new white couch for the patients to sit on. Her chair is still the same, but the drawings on the wall seem more modern.

"I like what you did to the place," I say as I'm gazing around the room. "Thank you, Ezie. I appreciate it." No one has the privilege to call me Ezie other than Sara and myself because it was the nickname my mother gave me.

"So, what do you bring to the table today?" Sara asks. "I saw Jackson today," I say, "Alissa and her friends were hanging out at the coffee shop, and he was there." Sara's eyes are still studying the situation, but I could tell she can sense more to the story.

"But it wasn't Jackson," I add, "It was Ash." The room got really quiet as I said his name. Sara was staring at me, looking baffled and confused with no knowledge of what she has to say in this situation. "You mean Ash?" Sara stutters. "As in, the only person who knows where your brother is, Ash?"

"Yes indeed," I say.

"But how?" Sara asks, still confused. For the first time in the months of knowing Sara, I felt like I was the therapist in this scenario. "I have no clue. He's living under a fake identity and looks different than he did in Manchester."

Sara still seems baffled over this whole situation. Ash being in London after going missing for 2 years is a huge deal for us, especially since he was dating the girl I admire.

"Does she know?" This is the question I've been asking myself all this time. Does Alissa know about him? "I don't think so, love," I say. "It seemed as if nobody knew because they all called him Jackson." Sara starts taking the time to think for herself until she finally says, "Try going out with him again." That doesn't seem like a bad idea at all.

"But how am I supposed to set that up?" It made no sense to go ask Alissa for her ex-boyfriend's number. Like, what would the question be? "Hey love, could I please have your ex's number because he isn't really your ex?" 

"Next time you meet him, you idiot," Sara seemed more enthusiastic about this than I did, and I felt like I couldn't fail her.

"Fine love, next time I see him, I'll try to get more details." Sara's eyes widen up, "and when you do, you come straight here," she demanded.

Going home later that day felt weird. I caught myself thinking about what I'm supposed to wear and how am I going to act on the big day tomorrow. For the first time in my life, I'm not worried about everything going on around me, and I get the chance to just be the person I know I am deep down inside. No brother drama, no Ash, just a chance to be myself with the girl I like.

***                                                                                                   

I had to get some work done before I went out with Alissa tonight. We finally planned to go to The Lampery in Copthall Avenue after spending hours talking about where we want to meet up. As I'm walking into my office, I get greeted by my lovely boss Jennifer who doesn't look too happy to see me. "Hello Jennifer, how has it been?" I ask politely, trying to cover the fact that I haven't shown up to work in almost two days. "You don't care, Ezekiel, so don't ask me that," she says, staring at her phone. "I forgive you for the last two days, but there is someone waiting for you in your office." Waiting for me in my office? That seems odd.

When I make it to my office, I see him gazing around, looking at my desk, the books I have laid around, all my notes. It was Ash. "What on earth brings you here?" I ask demandingly. He didn't take his eyes off the book he was reading on my chair. "You and I need to talk, my friend," he says. "About what exactly?" I'm angry at how unbothered the look on his face is. "And can you get off my chair for fuck's sake?" Ash finally stops looking at the book and turns his attention to me. He gets up from my chair and says, "You need to leave town and stop talking to Alissa." I look at him patiently, waiting for him to tell me that all of this is a joke.

"And may I ask why would I ever do that?" He smirks at me. "If you want to know where your brother is," Ash's eyes catch mine. He could tell I would do anything in the world to find my brother, but I don't know about this one. "I have a proposal," I say. "How about you get the fuck out of my office, and when I find my brother, I'll let you know." I dare say I got a rush of adrenaline as I said that to him. It felt like something I've bottled up all my life, but the look on his face changed.

He didn't look too happy with my proposal. After all, I wasn't expecting him to be too glad with it. "Fine, have it your way, Ezie, but you'll never find him without my help," he says as he makes his way out of my office, "and you know that." A part of me wanted to agree to his terms, but this isn't the Ash I remembered. That Ash is buried beneath layers of pain and agony. I can't lie and say he isn't right because if it weren't for him back in Manchester, I would've never left that awful place, and I would've never been able to get through all of the horrible events that used to happen there on a daily basis.

The day was nearly over, and I had to get back to my apartment and get dressed for the date tonight. I promised myself I wouldn't think about whatever happened today, and I won't, but the first thing tomorrow, I'll make my way to Sara's so we can discuss this strange encounter that happened at my office this morning.

I put on a black tux in hopes of looking like a gentleman. It's my first time going on a date, and I don't want to mess it up. On my way to Alissa's apartment, I noticed that I recognized the location she sent me. It was the same building that Sara's office is in, and I started thinking to myself, "What if Sara already knows Alissa? She never mentioned that she goes to therapy, but what if she does and we have the same therapist?"

My eyes lock in with Alissa's as she stands under the building waiting for me. She is wearing a black dress with white stripes across it and red lipstick. I freeze for a whole minute before calling out her name. I've never felt a rush of feelings consume my entire body like that before. Now that I think of it, I've never allowed someone to get as close as knowing what I do for a living, let alone go on a date with me.

"Alissa!" I beep twice and hold my hand out of the window so she can notice me. I see her walking towards the car now, examining the car with excitement. "I love the car!" she says as she opens the door and makes her way inside. I am driving a yellow Chevrolet Camaro to show my love for Bumblebee from Transformers. I don't know what it is about that movie, but I've always loved Bumblebee and his car. "Thanks, love. It's Bumblebee," I point at the Bumblebee bobblehead I have attached on top of the radio. "Childhood dream," I add. "Well, it's very cute," she says as she bumps his head. I can already feel the tension building up on the way to the restaurant, and I like the fact that she's busy playing music, which gives me time to think about this whole date. How do people do this?

I can see Alissa making her way to lower down the volume and look at me. "You've never been on a date, have you?" she asks. "Was it that obvious? Bloody hell," I say, trying to cover the embarrassment drawn on my face right now. I wouldn't say I never had time to go on dates, but I've always been so occupied with trying to make my past make sense that I never really looked ahead towards the future. "Make a turn here," she says. "We won't go to the restaurant anymore." I make the turn, but I have no idea why we completely changed the course of our date. Have I messed up before we even started?

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