Us Against the World (Louisiana Series #5)

Kabanata 37

37 - Courage

He didn't have to say where it was, because I instantly knew. I never came back to that house and I never thought of coming back, not even once. Not until now.

Mabilis akong kumilos at nagpadala ng mensahe kay Maddie kung nasaan si Zach. Hindi ko alam kung agad niyang pupuntahan, ngunit mas mabuting naroon din ako. Hindi na ako nag-abala pang kumain nang dumating ang order at dinala na lamang iyon. I drove fast and I was surprised I remembered the road back.

I parked my car beside the undeveloped road. Madilim pa ngunit maya-maya lang din ay magpapakita na ang liwanag. Malamig din kaya naman agad akong nagsuot ng jacket bago lumabas. The cold breeze embraced me when I stepped out of my car. Napapikit ako dahil sa hangin.

Mula rito ay tanaw ang isang maliit na bahay. Gawa ito sa kahoy at mayroong dalawang baitang na hagdan upang makapasok sa pinto. Walang nagbago sa bahay na iyon, ganoon pa rin gaya noong huli kong makita. I inhaled deeply and walked on the grass to reach the house. Malakas ang kabog ng dibdib ko habang palapit ngunit may nag-uumapaw ang kagustuhan kong balikan ang bahay. So many things happened here. Some I regret, some I don't.

Inakyat ko ang dalawang kahoy na baitang at itinulak ang pinto. It was dark. Kinapa ko ang switch sa dingding, sa gilid lamang ng pinto at binuksan ang ilaw. Kumirot ang puso ko nang makita ulit ang bahay. The small kitchen looked exactly the same, except there were no more things there. Ang maliit na lamesa ay naroon pa rin ngunit ang dalawang upuan ay wala na dahil wala na rin namang gagamit. Ang papag ay na sa parehong puwesto, ngunit ang mga unan at kumot ay wala na rin. It was empty, but my heart felt full on coming back to this house.

"Zachary.." I called.

He was sitting on the floor, with a few bottles of beer scattered around. Nakasandal siya sa papag habang hawak ang isang bote. His hair was messy, his eyes tired, his lips dry, and he looked wasted. He's wearing the same clothes like earlier when we fought at Mamita's. Lalong nagwala ang puso ko nang mag-angat siya ng tingin sa akin.

"You really came.." hindi niya makapaniwalang sabi. "You're here."

His voice was shaky, and his breaths were shallow. Pinigilan kong maiyak kaya naman hindi ko na hinintay na papasukin niya ako. I entered the house and closed the door behind me. Humigpit ang hawak ko sa supot na dala. Bahagya ko iyong inangat upang ipakita sa kaniya. I forced a smile to make him comfortable with me being here.

"I b-brought food."

Nanginginig ang tuhod ko nang umupo rin sa sahig gaya niya. Inilapag ko doon ang dala at itinulak ang iilang bote ng beer. His steady, penetrating gaze calmly followed me. Kahit ako ay hindi alam ang ginagawa ko. I sniffed and didn't let a tear escape. I shrugged and released an awkward laugh.

"I was hungry. I thought you might wanna join me."

"I'm drunk, Julianna.." he answered in a monotone voice.

Napalunok ako saka umiwas ng tingin. I bit my lower lip and slowly put the food back in the bag. I stared at my shaky hands for a moment before trying to break the ice again. I slowly nodded before plastering a smile on my face.

"Maddie called me. Hindi mo raw sinasagot ang tawag nila."

"That's why they made you call me?" malamig niyang tanong.

A hint of disappointment flashed through his eyes. He ran his hand through his hair before tilting his head away from me, trying to hide his deep frown.

"Sasagot ka raw.. kung ako ang tatawag."

He spoke with a sharp tone. "Right."

Huminga ako nang malalim. I tried not to get distracted with his coldness towards me. Alam kong galit pa rin siya sa akin at karapatan niya iyon. He has all the right to be mad at me. Hindi ko iyon ilalayo sa kaniya.