Detective Freak

Ch.29: The Will To Go On

I tugged on the blanket wrapped around me when a slightly cold breeze made me shudder, despite summer nearing. I rested my chin above my knees and watched as the sun slowly went down behind the thick wall that separated The White Ravens organization from the outside world.

Ever since I had woke up, I haven't talked to anyone except Christian. I spent three hours locking myself in the room that Samuel gave me. Christian was the only one to keep me company, not wanting me to feel lonely.

He had tried to convince me to go out and eat something since everyone was worried about me, but his attempts were useless, I wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone or eat anything. Besides, my parents would probably try to talk to me, and I didn't want to see them.

So Christian snuck me out to this garden inside The White Raven grounds. He said that I could use the fresh air without having to talk to anyone, so he left me here to relax for a bit. Honestly, without him, I couldn't have known what to do.

The place was indeed peaceful and quiet. The garden was beautiful, and there was no one but the birds and me. I inhaled a breath, closing my eyes and wishing that I could stay here forever.

"Christian told me that you were here." I opened my eyes at the familiar voice coming from behind me. I sighed, not bothering to turn around, for I knew that it was my uncle. I heard the sound of his footsteps as they walked over the grass, and then I felt him sit down next to me on the bench.

I didn't bother to look at him, and I just kept my eyes focused on the sunset. "I was worried, so I asked him where you were. Your boyfriend isn't a very good liar. I guess that's a good thing."

I didn't say anything. Instead, I turned my head to look at him. His hair was messy, and he had bags under his eyes. He looked like he hadn't slept for ages.

"You look like shit," I stated, my voice not entirely mine.

Uncle let out a small laugh while rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, well, I didn't get much sleep last night. I've been up all night talking to Jessie through the phone about, um, you know..." he trailed off.

"How have you been doing?" I had no idea why my mouth blurted out this question. The truth is that I was worried about my uncle. What he's been through is a lot worse than me because he thought that someone he knew his entire life was dead but is not. And I knew for damn sure that he misses her.

"I'm fine...but..." He sighed, his eyes trailing up to the sunset that made his eyes twinkle. "Honestly, I don't know what to feel. I'm very thrilled that my sister is alive, but at the same time, I'm terrified of losing her, and I'm also mad that she hid the truth from us all these years."

"But, you have no idea how happy I am to see her alive. Yes, I'm mad at her. But, I prefer her to lie to me than lose her again. But what about you, sweetie? This isn't easy for you. How do you feel?"

I could hear the concern in his voice, but I did not want to answer his question. I didn't want to make my uncle worry about me, so I came up with the best answer I could think of. "I don't know... I'll let you know when I'm feeling something."

I did not want to lie to my uncle and say that I was fine. Actually, I had no idea how I was feeling.

He pressed his lips on my temples, pushing my hair away from my shoulders. I faintly smiled, grateful that I had my uncle with me. He was the only family I could rely on right now.

"Do you ever think that they thought about us?" I asked. My eyes were looking at the golden sky above us as birds flew above our heads.

I heard my uncle sigh. "I don't think that you should be asking me that. I'm not the one who you should ask."