84 | her promise

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"I've placed the sales agreement on your desk for you to sign," Mrs

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"I've placed the sales agreement on your desk for you to sign," Mrs. Rogers says as soon as I come back from the meeting room.

I nod, walking into my office. I sit at my desk, leaning back against my chair as I think about Nevaeh. Even though we text and sometimes call each other during office hours, I just can't help but imagine the smile on her face every time she tells me something exciting about her college life.

There's one important thing I've been itching to ask her -- her six months program in Seattle is going to end soon, and I still don't know whether she's going to extend it or not.

I have no right to beg her to stay, but I don't want her to go just like that. Now that she's been a part of my life, it's hard to imagine it without her by my side.

I'm not saying that long distance would be enough to tear us apart, but maybe it is. It was horrible for me in the past despite the commitment I'd promised.

The three words Nevaeh said to me cross my mind again, and I shut my eyes. The denial inside me makes me want to brush that sentence off every time I think about it.

Why did she say that? Why?

It feels like a part of me knows the answer, but the other doesn't.

I've heard those words countless times from the woman I loved, and now I don't even know the meaning.

The big question that has been bothering me for years resurfaces again, and I know that I have to face it. I have to face my past to get rid of this darkness that Nevaeh has slowly healed me from. I'm no longer in it, but it's not completely gone. Chills run through my body as I think about the possibility of being consumed by the same darkness again.

My phone rings, and I look at the caller. It's mom.

Her voice echoes in my ear as soon as I answer her call. "How are you doing today? Are you busy?"

"Not anymore. Sorry, mom, I was in a meeting." A soft smile touches my lips.

She sighs. "I know that we just met you, sweetheart, but we already miss you and Nevaeh."

My heart feels warm after hearing that. The idea of Nevaeh being surrounded by my family makes me fantasize that she's going to be in my life forever. It sounds really good.

"You know, since the big day is approaching," mom starts again, "when will you come home to New York? We hope that you and Nevaeh can come here next weekend."

My brows furrow in confusion. "The big day?"

Mom huffs. "Please don't tell me that you forgot about it. I'm talking about your birthday."

I freeze.

Fuck.

I did forget about it. Is my birthday coming up?

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