3| James

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"She can't just leave!" I groaned shortly following Riley the moment it clicked that she had just left
"James wait-" Hunter called but I wasn't listening, I walked through our flat heading out the door like Riley had just done. Tilly was still sound asleep in my arms the moment I got to Riley's door

Surprisingly the door wasn't shut, it was wide open. Riley stood just passed the doorway looking into a closet
"What are you doing?" I asked watching as her whole body jolted hearing my voice
"Fuck James, can you not scare a girl to death please" Riley said standing up again, she turned to me looking down at Tilly before looking at me
"How old is she?" Riley asked making me sigh
"I'm not 100% sure. 3-4 months?" I offered making Riley narrow her eyes lightly before turning back to her closet 

"Do you think if I take her you could carry some things for me?" Riley asked making me nod as I passed Tilly over to her
I won't lie, holding Tilly is the scariest shit I've done in my entire life let alone in the last 24 hours. All it'll take is one wrong move and I could break her. I can't do that 

"What am I grabbing?" I asked and Riley nodded to a brown rucksack and two boxes
"The bag and both boxes" She said before stepping out of my way
It didn't take much to pick up both of them and to swing the bag over my shoulder before turning back to Riley
"Anything else?" I questioned but she shook her head picking up a grey carry case placing that on her shoulder 
"Where to?" I said bluntly. I wasn't trying to be snappy, I didn't mean it either I just.. I don't know

"To your flat James. It's things to help you with Tilly" She said making me raise a brow, I was going to say something else, I was going to ask her what she was doing. But Riley walked straight past me not offering me a single second glance

We got into our flat to see Hunter, West and Eldon all sat on the sofa. West massaging his temples probably anticipating the headache we will all occur tonight. Hunter was watching TV, no shocker and Eldon was flicking through something on his phone

"What is this all for?" I asked Riley as I placed the boxes down in on the dining table
"That is what you are going to need if you plan to make this father thing work" Riley said
"It won't be much but it'll get your start at least" Riley said opening one box that was practically full of baby clothes
"There are 3-6 months so may be a bit big on her but you can roll up sleeves etc" Riley explained
"This one has toys, books and a seat for her to sit in instead of the car seat. And then the rucksack has wipes, nappies, bottles and formula in them. The only issue is that the nappies may not be her size and she may not get along with that formula, you can run to the store if that's the case" Riley continued

"Her nappies are a size 2" I said making Riley nod
"She came with a couple and a pack of wipes and some papers" I explained making Riley look at me slightly confused
"Papers? Can I see them?" She questioned but I shrugged nodding over to the kitchen side where the small folder sat, Riley walked over to me handing me Tilly making me freeze again before walking to the papers

"James" Riley said rolling her eyes at me before I got the hint to join her
"This is Tilly's birth certificate" Riley said making me raise a brow
"She's 4 months old" I said watching as Riley nodded
"She's up to date on all of her jabs, she's just her 4 month check up. No known allergies either" Riley added offering me a smile as if to say that it was going to be okay

But was it?

I really cannot see how any of this would mean that things were going to be okay. Sure it's good that she has no allergies, she's up to date on everything else too but under what logic am I equipped to look after a fucking baby?

"Then we have this lovely contraption" Riley smiled looking over at the grey bag she had carried over
"What is it?" West asked making the boys finally zone back into the conversation
"It's a travel cot. Tilly is obviously going to need a proper crib as soon as possible but it'll get you through tonight at least" She explained walking over to the bag pulling the zip down and letting a small frame to fall out of it 

"What the hell is that" Hunter said making Riley laugh
"You boys are idiots do you know that?" Riley said looking at the three of them on the sofa before briefly turning to me

--

After a minute or two of Riley fiddling, the travel cot began to take form and started to look somewhat like somewhere a baby could sleep
"Do you want it in your room James?" Riley asked making me snap back into the room
"Oh uh, I guess. First door-"I started but Riley as practically already in the room
"How di-" I started before West cut me off
"Riley is in this place more then you are lately. She comes to help Eldon with his contacts, Hunter with his dating  choices and just to hang with me" West said making me nod before following Riley into my room to see her making the bed a little more comfortable for Tilly 

"You can put her down now James" Riley said quietly
I looked down at Tilly who was still soundly sleeping in my arms, her lips were pouted slightly while her hand had a small grip on her hair 
Nodding at Riley I took a step forward gently resting Tilly down into the travel cot before taking a step backwards sitting on the edge of my bed

My eyes didn't leave Tilly, I sat there watching her as she slept. It's crazy how oblivious she is. Tilly has no idea that her mother has just completely walked out of her life not even looking back. She has no idea she's stuck here with 4 idiots who don't have a clue what to do

The only person who has any understand of what to do is Riley and she isn't going to help long term, this isn't her probably to be caught up with and I'm certainly not bringing another person into this mess with me

"Look James, this must be a lot for you. I get it" Riley said taking a seat next to me but I couldn't turn to look at her
"You look at her like your one step away from breaking her. That's not going to be helpful for either of you you know" Riley said making me nod
"She's not going to break by you holding her, she isn't going to break if she cries for too long, as long as you feed her, bathe her, change her and love her. You've got this" Riley said making me finally turn to look at her

"I don't think I do" I whispered, she looked at me confused

"I can't do this" I warned her before turning back to Tilly
"she needs someone she can depend on, someone who knows what they are doing and I'm not that person" I explained

"Yes sure, this isn't the ideal situation for you James but you aren't alone in this. You have three best friends in the living room who will most definetly help you where ever they are. I'm across the hall for any emergencies. You'll adapt, it's daunting now but it'll come together" She said 

Somehow she had an answer for everything, I couldn't really argue her points but I also couldn't tame the nagging feeling in my that was screaming at me that this was a bad idea.. 

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